MASTER MINDS / Monogram Pictures -1949 / Bowery Boys

Tabonga gets the night off as he's having "swell time" on his vacation in Hell and wants to stay an extra day, so, Rodan's filling in for the old oak stump again... Actually he's exotic wood from some unknown island!

All I can say about our classic feature is, find youself a copy of this GEM! and watch it, you will not believe how cool it is, it has some of the funniest moments I have ever seen!!

The musical director is Mr. Edward J. Kay, with an incredible 328 music director credits! Eegah!! gives up a sampling of music with some great lines from this highly recommended comedy-horror film from 1949!!

Starts right here!.. MASTER MINDS!

Starts as usual, Sach (Huntz Hall) is 'gettin' ideas' from the ozone!

Then, Slip Mahoney (Leo Gorcey) has the big idea of making some cash at the carnival side show because Sach gets a 'psychic gift' after a devastating toothache from eating hard candy! It's as simple as banana peel pie!

The show is billed 'Ali Ben Sachmo' and Slip barks as the girlies dance to bring in the customers!

When in a trance, Ali Ben Sachmo actually predicts events and facts with 100% acuracy!

He connects a long lost dad up with his long lost sonny boy!

Meanwhile, back at the mad lab!

Okay, here's an absolutely awesome pack of weirdos, rivaling the great characters in another movie we've already posted, THE BOWERY BOYS MEET THE MONSTERS from a year earlier! If he looks familiar, that's Alan (Alfred on Batman) Napier playing Dr. Druzik, who's very clever and always one step ahead of everyone else...

Then, there's iconic Glenn Strange as the menacing, Atlas!

The doc decides he wants to change brain content with Sach and Atlas, since Sach is such a genius!!

So, he brings musclehead Otto and they visit Sach after the show. Sach has come out of the trance and is acting goofy, throwing the doc off a bit... But, ultimately, they're taking what they came for!

Wow, William Yetter and Skelton Knaggs... Whotta pair!!!

This part reminds me of BEDAZZLED when Stanley was confronted by the bouncer at George's club!

Thank you, Nikola Tesla!!!

Everything going perfectly, as planned!..

Now, this is where things get really fun!..

Atlas is now in Sach's body, and, guess what?.. He's just as tenacious! Otto and Hugo barely trick him into a cell before he destroys the entire place! The second still shows Sach mauling Otto as he tries to lock the cell door, which takes awhile because Sach is roughing him up so much!! It's effin' hilarious to see Sach as such a demon!

The real Sach now looks like this!

He breaks out of Forsythe and goes back to the gang's hangout, a malt shop ran by Louie, played by Leo's real father, Bernard. You'se can see's the reaction!.. Glenn is miming the mannerisms of Huntz, with Huntz's voicetrack. It is so damn funny!!

Awesome stuff here, waiting for Louie to return from the back room. You can get a DVD-R copy of this movie at videoscreams.com!

Sach gets tired of waiting for the invite, so he shows himself in!

When the gang go to the lab to find out what's going on, they're greeted by the maniacal Sach, so, it doesn't take long before they're all locked up!

Bad Sach harrasses the hell out of Louie and then good Sach tries to reason with the bad one!

In the end, Sach loses his tooth and Ali Ben Sachmo ist kaput, and, Slip's money machine disappears right in front of his eyes. Well, until the next movie for these great guys!!

POPEYE - Winston Sharples - "Fright To The Finish" (1954)

Well, we're coming down to the wire, and what would be more appropriate than a "Fright To The Finish" and a composer with a truly astounding list of credentials like Winston Sharples! Are you kidding, are you sitting down, cause I think this is a record on this site, Winston composed the music for 784 different cartoons!! How do they figger the influence of this man on millions of children's psyche? It's kinda like second hand smoke, Uum, uum, uum! At least his name wasn't Winston Marlboros, or I would really think there was some kind of conspiracy afloat here!

I loves this shot, and it gives me a good opportunity to tell you about some of the othe scary Winston Sharples' accomplishments!

Things that went bump in the night, back in the day, with titles like..."The Friendly Ghost"(1945), and "Stupidstitious Cat"(1947), and "A-Haunting We Will Go"(1949), and "Boos in the Night"(1949), and "Deep Boo Sea"(1952) etc, etc, etc!!

Olive is getting into the spirit of the season....

But the boys have other things on their minds!

Bluto's plan scares Olive Oyl out of everything but her drawers!

But it backfires in his face, and Popeye's overall good sense and strength of character prevail once again!!!!

FRANKENSTEIN’S CASTLE OF FREAKS (1974) – Directed by Dick Randall – Music by Marcello Gigante

Greeting dear friends, welcome once again to the agonizing pit of despair that is Zillagord’s private screening room. Pull up the imitation leopard-skin covered beanbag chair I purloined from the set of BLOOD FREAK and lemme tell you the terrible twisted tale of FRANK’S FREAKS. Yep, I’m gettin’ my FREAK on yet again! But don’t let that scare you off, I’m harmless as kitchen.

FRANK’S FREAKS is a lurid yet laughable Italian impost directed by that pie-eyed Paisan… um… Dick Randall?? OK, so he’s not Italian, but he left his little freaky fingerprints on many a foreign-made exploitation flick, including Dungeon fave King Of Kong Island, PIECES, and LUCIFERA: DEMONLOVER (wowsers!). He also helmed sexploitationers like AROUND THE WORLD WITH NOTHING ON (zowie!). His offerings to the trenchcoat crowd oughtta tip you off to the voyeuresque experience to come.

Music provided by Marcelle Gigante; he’s HUGE in Italy! Not really. But he does have over 30 credits to his big BIG name, including THE EMBALMER and Spaghetti westerns like PRAY TO GOD & DIG YOUR GRAVE and GOD MADE THEM… I KILL THEM!! More great titles!!

What is this that stands before me? After obligatory prologue, we are treated to atmospheric grave robbing scene! It’s quickly downhill from here folks…

This is pretty much the extent of Frank’s Freaks. Doc Frank is so ineffectual in this flick, he needs FOUR henchmen. They’re all creepy deviants with incongruently dubbed voices!

This lil’ necrophile, Genz, is also the biggest perv in flick. Girl’s only been outta the ground for a minute, he’s already coppin’ a feel. Geez, give her a chance to rub the dirt from her eyes.

Genz is always slinkin’ around, leering and peering: a stone creep. He’s played by Michael Dunn, who had the recurring role of Dr. Miguelito Loveless in TV’s WILD WILD WEST. Dunn was also in classic STAR TREK episode PLATO’S STEPCHILDREN and in WEREWOLF OF WASHINGTON [link]. Really a fascinating guy, I urge you to check out his IMDB bio!

Doc Frank (Rosanno Brazzi, PSYCHOUT FOR MURDER, YOUNG DRACULA) is the…uh… master of the castle. MOM! I told you to knock before coming in my room!

Frank’s monster is not actually a cobbled-together corpse but the reanimated body of a Neanderthal man with a chinchilla pasted to his forehead. No need to suspend disbelief here folks! Frank calls him Goliath, but you may remember him as Loren Ewing, who played Big John on original Batman TV series.

Frank’s daughter Maria (Simonetta Vitell, no hilarious title to her credit), who plans to wed at Frank’s castle. Where’s honeymoon, BLOOD ISLAND??

And here’s Valda (Laura De Benedettis, EROTIC DREAMS OF CLEOPATRA), who is evidently taking a break from her job as magician’s assistant and who inexplicably falls for the Doc.

Maybe it’s all the booze he has lined up! One bourbon, one scotch, one beer…

What would Herschel do? Hunchback Kreegin (Xiro Pappas, THE DEVIL’S WEDDING NIGHT) carves turkey while flirting with chambermaid! This is one hook-up you don’t wanna see. Warning: you will. Yeah friends, hunchback sex!

Pre-Internet porn! That’s dirty birdy Genz doin’ his nasty biz again.

After his private peepshow, he sneaks into the lab and goofs with Goliath. Doc Frank punts lil’ dude outta his castle. Big mistake, as Genz vows revenz.

Genz makes frenz with another caveman named OOK! OOK is played by—get this—Boris Lugosi!! Take that Marilyn Manson! Greatest stage name ever! Dude’s actual name is Salvatore Baccaro, credits include NAKED EXORCISM, STAR CRASH, and ATOR THE INVINCIBLE. No matter what his name, guy really looks the part, he oughtta be in those Geico commercials....

Wouldn’t you know that OOK’s cave comes complete with all the mod cons, including fire pit and hot tub! Genz getting rocks off on rocks!

It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again!

All that mud-rubbin’ makes Genz want some lovin’! He and OOK kidnap village girl, and not for darning loincloths!

SHAZBOT! OOK can’t believe his eyes as Genz shows him the birds ‘n’ bees. Really disgusting dwarf rape scene replete with ghasty carnal Genz-grunts. Hunchback sex was just a warm-up!

The moment we all were awaiting: Angry Villagers With Torches! A FRANKENSTEIN flick just wouldn’t be complete without ‘em!

Edgar Allan Poe looking for the Civil War reenactment.

Genz returns to release Goliath, who goes on a killing spree whilst looking for a reputable salon where he can wax that monobrow.

In a battle of the cavemen, it’s Goliath in one fall!

Velda tries to rescue Goliath, but her malapropos polka-dot blouse is a beacon for angry villagers…

As Goliath meets his fiery fate, clever manipulator Genz uses Velda’s sorrow as an opportunity for one final feel. Nuthin’ like cozyin’ up in front of a nice, warm fire. Man, I feel dirtier than a caveman after watching this thing. I’d take a shower, but I’m afraid that little bugger Genz’ll peep me too! I’m FREAKED!!!

JOHN BARTLES - IT'S THAT HALLOWEEN PUMPKIN PIE SPECIAL (Is Nothing Sacred?)

nOW WE'RE TALKIN' dUNGEON sTYLE hALLoWEEN!!!!

Two songs from the 'Master of the Macabre' the 'King of Halloween' and his D.I.Y. classic release, "It's That Halloween Pumpkin Pie Special (Is Nothing Sacred?)" John Bartles with "Much To Dead To Dance" and "Pumpkin Punk"!!! Hold on to your heart and hat, and good luck with that!

John Bartles sez Happy Halloween!!!