Wednesday, June 16, 2021

THE THREE STOOGES - "Three Little Pigskins" (1964)

Tonight's Wacky Wednesday feature is a short by The Three Stooges from 1934 called "Three Little Pigskins." If you want to have a wacky time, it's always easier when you have somebody like Lucille Ball around!
 
Lucille Ball was only twenty-three when "Three Little Pigskins" was made. I thought she was in more than one Stooges short, but I guess not.

Lucille Ball is gun moll Daisy Simms. Lucy was a natural brunette, but in these early days, she was a beautiful blonde, before becoming the krazy redhead that everybody knows and loves today. Lucille Ball is the most beloved TV actress of all time followed by Mary Tyler Moore, Carol Burnett. and Oprah Winfrey, and for good reason.
The woman behind her is Phyllis Crane as Molly Gray! Phyllis was in many film comedic shorts in the 1930's, and many of them were Three Stooges episodes. Walter Long is the mobster Boss who is worried his football team is going to lose. Walter has 207 credits, many in roles as a Henchman, a Bandit, a Gang Leader, a Convict, or a Chain Gang Member. He played a guy called The Tiger in three or four Laurel and Hardy shorts!

 
The boys are obnoxious street hustlers doing anything they can to make a dime!

This guy offers them ten bucks to walk around with these signs to advertise the big game coming up!
Of course they can't even do this simple task without screwing it up!

Gertie Green as Lulu Banks thinks they're real football players. Really? Look at Moe's helmet. I don't think Lulu's the sharpest knife in the drawer.

Lulu goes back and tells the other girls that she found the famous "Three Horsemen of Boulder Dam" to fill in the Boss's roster on his football team.

 
Larry and Lucy! What a pair!!

Moe's got his hands full with Lulu, he smacks her just like she was one of the guys, and she hits him right back, but harder!

The guys look a little too comfortable in these outfits!

Time to break out the seltzer bottles!

Lucy was 5'7" tall and kind of towers over Gertie and Phyllis who both stood about 5'2"

Now it's time for everybody to get into the act!

I could be wrong, but it really does look like they are enjoying themselves and having a good time!

The Three Stoogettes!

Next this game of Blind Man's Bluff goes awry! 
Sorry Moe, wrong woman!

The rest of this tale is about the woes of the boys trying to play football. They are clueless! You gotta love their jersey numbers though!

The Stooges are such idiots, they don't even have a rudimentary knowledge of the game, and this is not going to go well for them.

Moral of the story.................Don't mess with mobsters!!

I'll be back on Saturday with the second part of my little mini-tribute to Lucille Ball, and a full length film noir that starred Lucy. She really was one gorgeous and amazing gal!

Monday, June 14, 2021

DOS FANTASMAS Y UNA MUCHACHA / Two Ghosts And A Young Woman - 1959

Here's a decent little musical horror comedy from Mexico about two men that fight a duel over a woman where they both shoot each other and become ghosts. For 50 years they are confined to the theatre (by the boss ghost) they shot each other in because they refuse to become friends. After an incident, they become friends and use their ghostly skills to foil the bad guys.

It stars German Valdes aka Tin-Tan, Ana Luisa Peluffo and Manuel 'Loco' Valdes (brother of German). 

It all starts at the theatre Ana is performing her number, until...

In one box, German confronts Manuel in another box for the hand of Ana/

Manuel pulls out his revolver, and German does the same... They both shoot each other and end up as ghosts in the old theatre where it all happened

For 50 years they feud with each other but then something happens that ends the rift, and they team up to use their unearthly skills.

You see, this couple came into the old theatre for some alone time, but when the guy abuses the woman, the duo steps in. The floating hand trick works every time!

Thing is, the girl looks exactly like their beloved Ana, obviously a relative. The boys introduce themselves and pledge that they'll be around if needed.

But first, the boys put on some ghostly acts for her as she sits in a theatre seat. Love this one, it's just freaking out there!

And some kaleidoscope fun to boot.

They pop in at the end of the act to remind her that they'll be watching...

Holy cow!!.. She's in a monster musical movie and is getting ready for the shoot.

She plays the heroine chased by all the monsters! Weirds-Ville! After all, it's a musical.

In one scene where this guy interacts with Ana (I guess), well, they invisibly punch him and it may be my favorite scene, great acting.

The director can't believe what he's seeing as the ghosts wreak havoc on the set

They become visible and the cameras keep on rolling!

These robbers try and extort money from the film's producer, but...

Could it be possible that the boys are lurking around in the room?

German tells the head crook to go ahead and shoot him in the head and sees what happens. The guy shoots him, nothing happens except some smoke. Then German mentally sends a diesel locomotive at the bad guy and he turns to jelly...

It ends with German, Ana and Manuel dancing off into the sky, a fun little flick!

Saturday, June 12, 2021

SETTE ORCHIDEE MACCHIATE DI ROSSO - "Seven Blood-Stained Orchids" (1972)

This Edgar Wallace Saturday Night Special is a little bit different than most, starting with it's Italian, and not German!

 
 
Everybody else gets their credits superimposed on them from one of their scenes, but not big shot Antonio, he gets a full shot of just his name!
Antonio (When Men Carried Clubs And Women Played Ding Dong" Sabato just passed away this last January at the age of 77.

Being German, gooshy Uschi Glas, billed here as Uschi Glass, was in quite a few other Edgar Wallace films like "The Gorilla Gang," and "The Sinister Monk." She also graced the screen in classics like "Suck Me Shakespeer," and "Schmucklos!"

I think this was the only Edgar Wallace film that Pier Paolo Capponi was in, but he was in Argento's "The Cat o' Nine Tails."

I don't think Marina Malfatti was in any other Edgar Wallace films either, but she was in another bloodstained feature in 1973, "The Bloodstained Lawn!"

As far as I can tell, Rosella (Black Belly Of The Tarantula) Falk was in no other Edgar Wallace films either.

I don't see any other Edgar Wallace films in his portfolio, but talk about versatile, Claudio was in everything from "Gidget Goes To Rome," to "The Death Ray Of Dr. Mabuse."

But not for long!!
Marisa Mell was also in EW's "Secret Of The Red Orchid," and along with Cladio Gora was also in "Danger: Diabolik!"

I think I could have passed for that guy holding the bottle in 1972!

"Seven Blood-Stained Orchids" is a movie about a serial killer in Italy!

Now this is a formidable looking police car if I ever saw one!

They call him The Half-Moon Killer for good reason! He leaves one of these at the scene of the murder!

Pretty cool record if you're into straight razors!
"Sette Orchidee Macchiate di Rosso" was directed by Umberto (Eaten Alive!) Lenzi, and the great soundtrack was composed by Riz Ortonlani.

Monster Music

Monster Music
AAARRGGHHH!!!! Ya'll Come On Back Now, Y'Hear??