This is an especially cool Saturday Night Special because this movie is whack, almost as whack as this poster!
"Kiss The Girls And Make Them Die" is a Dino De Laurentiis Production, so even though it's a quasi-comedy, it's still serious!
Talk about serious, how much do you think it cost to be able to film at the site of one the world's most famous landmarks, the Christ the Redeemer statue high above Rio de Janeiro that was created in 1932?
Mike (Mannix) Connors is a C.I.A. agent named Kelly! In some movies like "Voodoo Woman," Mike was credited as Touch Connors. Born in Fresno, California, Mike just passed away a few years ago at the age of 91.
I got acrophobia just from watching this, and this was just the opening sequence!
The rest of the movie is filled with beautiful women because the perverted freak who wants to take over the world needs them. He has a plan to make the whole world sterile, and then re-populate it with a bunch of women impregnated by himself! This dude is a real pig!
One by one, a bevy of beauties just keep disappearing!
Then Dorothy (The Roaring 20's) Provine shows up as Susan Fleming and steals the show!
Raf (The Godfather: Part III) Vallone is the dirty dog creepmeister Mr. Ardonian, and he's really good at it!
Ardonian has hidden cameras all over the place so he can monitor his girls without their knowledge! The list of the gorgeous gals includes names like Margaret Lee, Nicholetta Machiavelli, Marilù Tolo, Seyna Seyn, and Beverly Adams,
Shake it, don't break it!
Rich and famous.............................
..................Mr. Ardonian..................
..................Is a bonifide creepy-ass nut case!
In the meantime, Agent Kelly is outfoxing Ardonian at every turn!
Luckily Kelly likes bananas, because along with cigarettes, they are basically his whole diet!
Great shot of Terry-Thomas, Mike Connors, and Dorothy Provine! One thing I really enjoyed about this film was that even though it's an adventure/comedy, they gave Terry-Thomas a fairly straight role for a change. The character he plays is still odd, but not totally obnoxious and stupid like he is so often cast!
Ardonian has all the girls preserved in these tubes, and on hold until he needs them!
Looking back, I'd say "Kiss The Girls And Make Them Die" is no James Bond film by any means, but it really isn't half bad either. I got this film from Cult Action years ago, who I just found out is no longer in business, so after I'm done here, I'll have to remove their link, since it, just like a lot of the characters in this movie, is dead, but at least you can still watch the trailer if you want to, at the
4 comments:
Anyone who wants to see Mike Connors in a completely funny role (as opposed to a tongue-in-cheek one) should try to find the obscure comedy SITUATION HOPELESS, BUT NOT SERIOUS, with Alec Guinness and a very early Robert Redford.
It's ridiculous that it's never made it to DVD.
Thanks Grant! I did a video search for "SITUATION HOPELESS, BUT NOT SERIOUS" and found it streaming in two parts. I watched just a little, and will add it to my list of films to watch some day!
I'm glad to be helpful, especially with that one. It's very underrated, at least to me.
Always on the lookout for weirdness. From what I saw, that one qualified.
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