LE PROCÉS - "The Trial" (1962)

 

I don't even know what to say about this week's Saturday Night Special, but I can tell you that it was written and directed by Orson Welles, based on a novel by Franz Kafka, and is called "Le Procès," or "The Trial." Other than that, you're mostly on your own!

I could sum it all up in one word, Orson Welles, but since that's two words, we'll just have to settle on weird!

"Le Procès" stars Anthony Perkins as Josef K. It was made two years after "Psycho," so Anthony was already used to acting strange!

This is where Josef K. works.

It's 1962, and you could have taken your girlfriend to see "The Brain That Wouldn't Die," or "Invasion Of The Star Creatures," but no, you had to choose "The Trial," and now she never wants to speak to you again! Nice job Chucko!

"Le Procès," is a very paranoid minute shy of being two hours long!

I think it's quite possible that a person could go insane trying to figure it all out!

Josef K. is on trial for something he doesn't even know about, but he's not taking it lying down!

He is determined to not get eaten up by the system!

There are a bevy of beauties to entice and enthrall Josef K, like Jeanne Moreau as Marika, Romy Schneider as Leni, and Elsa Martinelli as Hilda, and apparently, they are all crazier than Hell!

Josef finds some dusty old law books, and remarks about how dirty they are!

A quick peek inside reveals how really dirty they were!

Angles and bi-angles abound!

Persecution, prosecution, perversion, and paranoia! Josef K. is surrounded by it all!

Most of the film was shot in Zagreb, Croatia, but some of the scenery is from France and Italy, like this scene that was shot at the Palazzo di Giustizia, or The Palace of Justice in Rome. If you go to Zagreb today, don't forget to visit "The Museum Of Broken Relationships" which opened in 2006!

 

Orson Welles assigned himself the role of the useless but very powerful Advocate!

The artiste who paints portraits of the judges is named Titorelli, and he resides in possibly the strangest place you'll ever see. As Josef K. ascends the stairs to Titorelli's loft, he's pursed by a gaggle of presumably mad young ladies who want to get their hands on him oh so badly, but Titorelli has them all locked out!

Is any of this making any sense? I sure hope not!

 Look at the composition of this room where Titorelli lives, it would be almost impossible to be any busier!

The safe exit that avoids the girls goes right back into Josef K.'s office!

Two hours of sheer madness and you don't know why it all started, and when it's over, you're not sure where you've been!

I'm not about to go toe to toe with Franz Kafka or Orson Welles, but I will suggest that when you watch "The Trial," do not be under the influence of anything, or you just might fall down the rabbit hole and never make it back!

THE THREE STOOGES In "A Pain In The Pullman" - 1936

Here's a fun one from the boys, the Stooges are small time actors, they take a train to an engagement for a show. They take their pet monkey along with them so you know there's going to be a barrel full of wackiness in store for all the other passengers on the train! It also stars the great Bud Jamison as Johnson, who's in charge of the the travelling acting group.

The whole thing starts right here, at Mrs. Hammond Eggerley's Theatrical Apt's, that's where the Stooges are living with others in the acting profession.

The boys are practicing their dancing act (a free for all) and shuffle off to Buffalo only to end up in their neighbor's room with a crash. The guy whose room it is, is leading man Paul Pain, a real heart-throb he says, and is totally insulted by the Stooges' antics...

To make things worse, the boys' little monkey jumps on the guy's face and rips his toupee off! The Stooges aren't making any friends here.

The boys get the call to join the other acts on the train for an engagement, so they pack up their stuff (one shirt!) and head off to the train depot.

After barely getting past their landlady, the boys mow down this guy walking down the street with the giant trunk.

They're ordered to put their monkey in the baggage car for the trip but get there too late, so they stuff him in a big bag and put him up in their berth...

The boys find an open door and see a big crab and some champagne (ordered by Paul Pain) just sitting there, ready to be enjoyed... Moe cracks the crab on Curly's head.

Larry don't think crab is that great.

When something gets out of hand, Johnson is called on to solve the problem, since he's the trip's manager. He wakes with a start in his berth, and hits his head on the top of the small cubical he's sleeping in..

Pain is calling Johnson to find out what the Stooges are doing in his room! And eating crab shells and spitting out the meat!

At this point Johnson informs the boys that if they don't stop with the antics, well, he'll personally throw them all off the train, while it's moving!!

So, the monkey gets loose and is scampering around in the sleeping car, so, Curly goes looking for him. Then, Curly hears a woman's voice calling to him... Come to me my dear, come to me!.. It's a woman talking in her sleep.

Curly opens the curtain where the woman says... Kiss me my dear... And so Curly bends down and kisses her. And she wakes up.

John is called again and he orders them to get into their berth before he throws them off the train! Larry immediately falls out, so...

Moe and Curly toss him into the berth!

After they all fall out of the berth, Moe hits Larry over the head with another person's suitcase!

Paul Pain is bothered by the commotion and calls on Johnson once again.

Okay, this is like the seventh time Johnson hits his head. He gets out of bed.

Then the monkey hangs on the emergency line and causes the train to come to an abrupt stop. That photo is awesome.

So, now's the time to throw the Stooges off the train and end this crazy adventure. 

JAPANESE SPIDERMAN - "Dokuro Dan Tai Akuma No Reikyusha" - "Skull Gang Vs. The Devil's Hearse" (1978)

 

This week's Weird Wednesday presentation is the Japanese version of "Spiderman" from 1978, and take my word for it, it doesn't get much weirder than this!

 

Okay, we've already done "The Turkish Spiderman" from 1972!

 

And we've already done "The Italian Spiderman" from 2007, but nothing quite compares to "The Japanese Spiderman" from 1978!

 

First off, you've got a villain named Professor Monster, it's hard to get much cooler than that!

Professor Monster cruises around in a hearse so as not to attract attention! WTF!?

This episode of "Spiderman" was titled "Skull Gang Vs. The Devil's Hearse."

Now that title alone has got to make you wonder!

That's a VERY old pinball machine!

"Japanese Spiderman" has a very large bracelet on his wrist, and these are the inner workings!

 Krazy kids!

This looks pretty straight forward Spiderman!

But because this is "Japanese Spiderman," he's got a big flying robot buddy!

I couldn't figure out why he has a crease in his forehead!

He's still got good Spidey webcrawler skills!

This Spiderman doesn't have any web controllers, and is left with rope swinging or mighty jumps like this to get by!

The action is fast and furious!

The head of the biker gang was turned into a chameleon machine by Professor Monster and is controlled by his hot mess assistant Amazoness!

Spiderman's big buddy makes sure it's a fair fight!

 

The chameleon humanoid monster is defeated, and the world is once again a safe place to live!

That's about as good as it gets!