I had no idea what to expect when I sat down to watch "Italian Spiderman," and I wasn't really expecting much, because this is obviously a silly and stupid movie, but I was quite surprised to find myself laughing out loud, because this movie is actually quite funny!
Welcome to the Saturday Night Special Dungeon style!
There are no rules to "Italian Spiderman!" It's kind of hard to even know what side of the law he's on because he is such a politically incorrect jerkoff, but this guy cracks me up! He's absolutely and positively hilarious!!
"Italian Spiderman" is nothing it pretends to be! It pretends to be an Italian movie, but it was made in Australia. Pretty funny when "Hmm" has to be translated, but that's the kind of thing that "Italian Spiderman" is about! As far as having anything to do with the "Spiderman" comics, there is none!
"Italian Spiderman's" blackjack is a real blow to his opponent!
"Italian Spiderman" is not in shape or good looking, or even Italian, but he has a way with women because, well, because he's Italian as far as the movie is concerned!
"Italian Spiderman" was written by and played by David Ashby, who along with Dario Russo who directed it, are responsible for an Australian TV series that ran for four years called "Danger 5" that I know absolutely nothing about at all, but from what I see here, it's probably ridiculously funny!
Hopefully, Paul from Oz will let us know!
Another element that makes this show so good is that the music is also brilliant! There is no person named Enzo Bontempi! The music is created by Dario Russo, Will Spartalis, and Josh Van Looy. The credits are so cool, I could have showed you just those shots and it would have been fine!
"Italian Spiderman" smokes his way through the whole movie, and this was his brand of choice, an "Extra Quiet" rooster!
A crocodile has broken into his pad!
"Italian Spiderman" is a womanizer, but he's always telling other people to "Respect Women," then he smacks them in the face!
Here's how the perv respects women himself!
"Italian Spiderman's nemesis is Captain Maximum!
Here's a shot from the wild green screen chase scene!
"Italian Spiderman" gets fed some psychedelic drugs, and ends up washed up on a beach on some remote island only to find Captain Maximum there waiting for him? After the offer of the Mojito, Captain Maximum challenges "Italian Spiderman" to a Surf Off.
More green screen lunacy!
Then when Captain Maximum's girls start getting the best of "Italian Spiderman," he calls on this special power! Penguins start flying all over the place and knocking people out!
Despite a lot of sexual situations, there's no nudity, very little bad language, and the violence is too funny to even comment on! "Italian Spiderman" could almost be a perverse Disney movie!
This Captain Maximum henchman has got "Italian Spiderman" in his sights!
"Italian Spiderman" turns the tables and takes out the sniveling sniper!
"Italian Spiderman" is ready for anything!
Just when we thought Captain Maximum was dead, he takes some drugs and now is a Godzilla-like Gargantuan!
"Italian Spiderman" is just too good in so many ways. There's no contrived ending because there doesn't need to be one, because the story is just one big joke anyway. One of my biggest complaints is that movies go on too long. "Italian Spiderman" clocks in at 40 minutes, the actual perfect amount of time to keep my attention! It's idiotic but smart, and they don't waste time! It's really kind of sad that it wasn't continued!