Saturday, January 6, 2018


 It's a thrill to be here tonight! I've been watching some olde trailers lately, and in the 50's, here's some of the language they would use to get you excited and all fired up for that next cheap flick!

 Single words were always effective!

 But I think single words should always have exclamation points!

 Now these people get it!!!

There are a couple of categories you can throw these things into, like this is basically an announcement!

That wasn't good enough, so they had to play the "Ultimate" card!

But then the announcements start getting scarier!

 And if a nightmare threatening the world isn't enough for you.......

.....Then it's terrifying time!

 And what's more terrifying that most terrifying? More terrifying!

 What's worst? Something "More Terrifying Than Any Horror Known To Man" or "The Biggest Shock Of A Lifetime?" Most likely at that point, it ain't gonna make much difference!

Speaking of shocking, the next phase are the warnings, and these are the things you really have to watch out for, because it's all really bad from here on out!

 Okay, "Fear Will Pierce Your Flesh," which doesn't sound very appetizing at all, and if that's not bad enough,

 "Your Flesh Will Crawl!" That's just creepy!

"Brutal and Blood-Thirsty!"
 Oh, yeah, let's party!

 And the best warning of all comes from you know where!!

Because if you don't heed that warning, this can happen to you!
(Looking at this really makes me want to go watch "The Blob" right now!)

And what appears to be the mildest message might just be the scariest of all, because we as a society might have already entered this phase!!

1 comment:

Ralphie Bitsko said...

Love this shit -

Monster Music

Monster Music
AAARRGGHHH!!!! Ya'll Come On Back Now, Y'Hear??