Saturday, September 23, 2017

THE LAST HORROR FILM - Joe Spinell (1982)

Tonight's Saturday Night Special is dedicated to my dear friend Zillagord, since he's the only person I know that is sleazier than Joe Spinell in this flick, and he knows just exactly why!

It's sometimes known as "The Last Horror Movie," or sometimes..
"Fanatical Extreme!"

Joseph J. Spagnuolo, aka Joe Spinell is Vinny, a super loser New York cab driver who wants to make movies!

Vinny is slightly obsessed with a beautiful actress named Jana Bates!

Vinny's fanatical fandom for Jana, who is going to be at the Cannes Film Festival, makes him decide to go there, and plead with her to be in his movie!

Once in Cannes, this movie goes one hundred percent Screaming Yellow Bonkers with a Zima Bloody Mary chaser!

Vinny has many visions of his fame and fortune, but unfortunately for him, they're only in his head!

If life was a pinball machine, then this movie got tilted!

Let the carnage begin!!


Dungeon super-heroine Caroline Munro is the good sport actress Jana Bates that Vinny is so fixated on! Right here, she looks like she just tried one of my refrigerator pickles!
You can read about some of Caroline's other fantastic films including "Star Crash" (Which also featured Joe Spinell), "The Golden Voyage Of Sinbad," and "Don't Open Till Christmas" right

So, one by one, all the people associated with Jana Bates are getting gruesomely picked off, and Vinny seems to be up to his neck in some serious bullshit!

There's no shortage of nudity, that's for sure but then they are in the French Riviera, where people aren't so uptight about that thing because they don't eat cheeseburgers five times a week!!

Vinny is a little insecure and calls his Mom a few times to tell her how successful he is!
I love this part! Vinny's Mother is played by Filomena Spagnuolo, aka Mary Spinnel, who is actually Joe Spinell's real Mom! She also has 13 other acting credits!

They also don't eat French Fries with those Cheeseburgers in Cannes!
Brilliant location choice for a film!

Vinny's wild obsession with Jana Bates makes him do fun things like project her face on his naked body!

Vinny goes to a strip club, and this hot stripper drives him so insane that he jumps on the stage and starts humping her! He's quickly removed from the premises!

Vinny's visions are pretty comical most of the time!

After getting snubbed time and time again, Vinny decides to try the more direct approach!

This doesn't work out to well for him either!

Now Jana is out of there and off running down the street, but when the people of Cannes recognize her, they just all think it's a publicity stunt, and don't try and help her at all!!

The end is a twisted mess of a movie inside a movie!

In his own warped mind, Vinny thinks he's the big winner instead of the big loser that he really is!

The final scene shows Vinny and his Mother sharing a joint! 
To tell you the truth, I didn't really like "The Last Horror Film" that much when I was watching it, but after it was over, I kept thinking, you know, that really wasn't that bad of a movie!!
Joe Spinell died in 1989 at the age of 52, and his Mother passed away two years earlier in 1987 at the age of 83. What a killer family!
So, let's just hope North Korea and the United States stop their chest thumping shenanigans, or this just might truly be "The Last Horror Film!"
Oh, and I just found out, if you have an Amazon Prime account, you can watch this movie for nothing, and I suggest you do!

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