THE AVENGERS - "The Cybernauts" (1966)

Right now, nothing appeals to me any better than "The Avengers," so that's what you're going to get on this fine Wednesday, March 2021! 

"The Cybernauts" was the third episode from the fourth season of "The Avengers," and aired March 28, 1966, almost exactly 55 years ago, and it's still just as good as the day they made it!

 

People are getting killed and there always seems to be an ink pen involved!

Not even a shotgun can stop the mayhem!

Steed remarks that this would be a good shotgun for shooting chandeliers!

Something big is at the door!

And after the death and destruction, another pen is at the scene of the crime!

This gal is supposed to be pretty tough, but Mrs. Peel disposes of her easily!

 

 This is a pretty funny moment that made me wonder if it was in the script or impromptu. Mrs. Peel is dusting the room, and then she dusts off Steed a little bit too.

 

Try and wrap your brain around this fact. KISS have a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, but neither Patrick Macnee or Diana Rigg do!!

 

The guy in charge of all the mayhem is Dungeon Hero Michael Gough, as mean Dr. Armstrong! Shame, shame, Michael Gough also does not have a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame!

 

The big Cybernaut robots under Dr. Armstrong's control are tuned in to anyone who has one of his guidance pens on them, so he kindly gives one to Steed!

 

Boy, would I like to have this table full of toys!

Steed finally gets to meet the big guy while he's in his dormant state, but that doesn't last for long!

 

As it turns out, Dr. Armstrong has another Cybernaut working for him too, but this one is not a hit man, he's a maintenance man.
 

 

I love all the monitors in Dr. Armstrong's lab!

 

They plant the homing device pen meant for Steed on the maintenance man robot, and the two Cybernauts duke it out!

 

Dr. Armstrong loses his shit! He can't believe he's been foiled by John Steed and Mrs. Peel!

The two robots beat each other senseless, and become comepletely non-functional, and Mrs. Peel can't believe she was able to push the hit man robot over with one finger!

I'll be back on Saturday with the followup episode they did in 1967 that's in colour, that was called "Return Of The Cybernauts," so stay tuned

THE THREE STOOGES In "Out West" - 1947

After a visit to the doctor, it's recommended that Shemp go out west to relax, which should help with his condition. Shemp was born in March so I thought that this would be a good one for March Madness, here at The Dungeon!..

The doc tells the boys that Shemp has a big old vein in his leg (the biggest he'd ever seen!) and suggests that they go out west to alleviate his condition, which makes no sense. The doctor makes a drawing of the vein and gives it to Shemp.

The boys arrive in the old west, dressed out in their cowboy duds. They also discuss how to appear to be tough hombres.

Bad guy Doc Barker overhears the boys talking about Shemp's big vein but thinks they're talking about a gold mine. It's the biggest you've ever seen!

Doc decides to get Shemp involved in a card game, and plans on winning over the drawing with the help from his pal on the left.

Shemp has taken his boot off because his foot itched. The guy thinks that he's handing Doc an ace but puts it between Shemp's toes...

Shemp grabs the card and it's a ace! He pulls a deuce out of his hand and passes it along to Doc, who gives the evil eye to his pal.

In the meantime, Moe and Larry are mixing up some very special drinks for the guys at the card table, Shemp is supposed to get the glass of sarsaparilla.

Shemp doesn't have enough money to cover the bet so he gives Doc the paper in exchange for a thousand dollars for betting.

Shemp ends up with all four aces from the card passing and beats Doc's royal flush. So, Doc has to pay up.

The drinks show up, but, when Moe was bringing them over, he bumped into a cowboy and now doesn't know which drink is Shemp's.

Doc slugs down half a glass of the paint and paint remover laced drink and is fine until the effects hit him!

The boys get the jail keys away from Doc and Nell goes to the cell where Doc and his pals have The Arizona Kid (her true love) locked up. She tells him that he must ride and go get the cavalry, it's the only way to save the day...

Moe and Shemp go to the cell, Larry's now the one locked up by Doc. They bring along some big noisy tools to get their stooge out, Nell thinks fast and runs upstairs.

She has the piano guy pound a tune as she sings loudly to cover up the clanking and banging going on in the other room.

And what do you know?!.. The cavalry's on the way!

The boys are surrounded, but of course a wacky chase ensues, until...

Their backs to the wall, Shemp grabs a stick of TNT and accidently lights it when he holds it above a lamp. Doc and his pals run like Hell out of the room. The boys think their bluff worked.

Doc and his guys hide behind the bar but Larry tosses it away exactly where they are.

The cavalry has arrived too late and the General's angry for having been inconvenienced. So, there you go, and Shemp gets the last word...

OMNIBUS - "Whistle And I'll Come To You" (1968)

 

This week's Saturday Night Special was an interpretation of a short story by classic ghost story author M.R. James titled "Oh, Whistle, and I'll Come to You, My Lad"

 

"Omnibus" was a British TV show that was on the air from 1967 to 2003, that specialized in presenting documentaries with an emphasis on music and the arts. Over the years they have had everybody on the show from Pink Floyd, Debbie Harry, and Prince, to Orson Welles, Ray Bradbury, and Ken Russell. Tonight's program is an odd one, and is an actual fictional ghost story written by M. R. James, and not a documentary, something they rarely did. I guess they were just trying to spotlight his work!

 

"Whistle And I'll Come" is  almost a one man show, and stars Michael (Theater Of Blood) Hordern as that one man, an intellectual olde codger named Professor Parkins. The story was redone in 2010 as a TV movie starring John Hurt.

 

The Professor is taking a few days off and staying at this rustic inn in Norfolk in The Bristish Isles!

Since this was an educational show, we get to watch two British birds make a bed in real time.

That's George (Horror Of Dracula) Woodbridge as the proprietor strolling down the aisle to meet his new guest. George has a muttering, almost undecipherable style, right out of the Stanley Unwin school of acting.

"Whistle And I'll Come" and the main character Professor Parkins are both odd, and a lot of the action either doesn't exist, is understated, or moves at a snail's pace. The run time is only 42 minutes, and there are at least five 'eating' scenes where basically nothing happens. You'll be on the edge of your seat waiting for the next bite, or something to break loose, but this is not that kind of story.

Seemingly, most people come to this area to play golf, but the Professor is not one of them. He just wants to go for long walks on the beach, and to explore the local cemetery.

The Professor finds a grave in the most peculiar place, right on the edge of a cliff overlooking the ocean!

Looking closer, the Professor finds an object that turns out to be an olde whistle. Naturally he retrieves it, unnaturally, he shouldn't have!

Now it appears someone or some thing is following him, but it never gets any closer than this.

Back in his room, the Professor cleans up the whistle, finds an inscription on it, and gives it a little toot!

Now it's time for another meal, and some very rambling conversation with another one of the guests.

The Professor then goes on another walk, stops and eats a sandwich, drinks a pint, and does a little reading. You can only imagine how exciting it is to watch a person read.

Slowly, and I mean slowly, things start to happen that make the Professor uncomfortable, and he's starting to have problems sleeping.

Then the dreams start up!

And linger on way past waking!

There is a very odd occurrence; a bed with a bunch of rumpled sheets appears in the Professor's room, and neither he nor the staff seem to have any knowledge of how it got there.

Finally, one night an apparition appears, and moves around in the sheets of the strange bed, and scares the living crap out of the Professor.

 

The Professor is emotionally scarred by the whole situation, and will never be the same man again, and that's it. That's how real ghost stories work!