Friday, March 18, 2016

THE GARBAGE PAIL KIDS MOVIE / Atlantic Entertainment Group, Topps Chewing Gum - 1987

It's time to get gross! I actually collected and had a complete set of all the series, sold them on eBay years ago for a good profit. The appeal was they were fun and the artwork was Topps!

I have a gross little sound clip for your approval, sooooo, you can push the big red 'GO' button located there by our atomic fart machine, NOW, Rufus The Gnat!.. Here's... THE GARBAGE PAIL KIDS MOVIE!

Anthony (X, THE UNKNOWN) Newley plays antique shop owner Captain Manzini. He tries to store the garbage pail full of green slime but it gets tipped over, releasing the power of the little alien kids on Earth. Ready or not, here they come!!

They're gross to be sure, that's Foul Phil on the right doing his thing, you can hear him cut loose in the sound clip... Pee-yew!!

They also have lots of snot and wet themselves whenever things get tense. They were ahead of their time, all these bodily functions are very popular nowadays as delivered in shows like FAMILY GUY, ROBOT CHICKEN, BOB'S BURGERS and many more.

They go to a bar and get in a big fight with some bikers. The bikers are so impressed with the Kids' fighting skills, they all become fast friends! We live in a wacky world, peoples...

I'm not quite sure what to think about this scene. Little Dodger, the Captain's helper, gets a sultry kiss from eighties fashion girl, Tangerine!!

The Kids are also very interested in Earth Girl anatomy, having a lot in common with Tabonga!

There's even a Garbage Pail Kids lunchbox with a gross eyeball for a snack!

Later, the bikers help the little scamps break a bunch of social misfits out of their prison.

At the fashion show, the GPK gang disrupt the festivities. They start by ripping the clothes off all the sexy models, making for a big pile of eye candy!

Dodger ends up knocking the crap out of the bad guy, Juice. That should turn Tangerine on!

Anyway, the Garbage Pail Kids head off to who knows where to spread their gross ways! Join us again tomorrow for more from... The Dungeon!

Wednesday, March 16, 2016

BURY ME AN ANGEL - East-West Pipeline (1972)

Tonight's feature is a top contender in the category of "Why In The Fuck Would You Even Bother" school of film making! That being said, welcome to The Dungeon! Now just look at this poster, why would any sane person be swayed in their opinions by anybody involved with film making from Ronald Reagan to Angelina Jolie, when posters for the movies over the years are nothing but blatant lies and deceit, and really nothing but false advertising! Sure, I know this is just a low budget movie, but trust me, she didn't take on the whole gang, and a more appropriate rewording of the thrills in this flick would be something like a girl on a motorcycle seeking revenge with a whole lot of boring filler footage in between!

It's called "Bury Me An Angel!" Why? I have no clue, motorcycles I guess.
I normally have nothing but respect for anybody attempting to make a movie, but lately I've been a little more critical when the end product is nothing more than a piece of crap like this! But..................On a more positive note, the bluesy hard rockin' music in the movie by East-West Pipeline is pretty cool! Kinda reminds me of some Blue Cheer! Here's some of the title song to prove it!

So let's get this party rolling!

This is what they called an eye hit in 1972!

Looks pretty Sci-Fi right about here!

The party was rockin' and out of nowhere, some guy just comes to the door and blows this guy's face off!

This fellow is the guy who pulled the trigger!

So the sister of the victim who is named Dag, played by Dixie (ANGELS DIE HARD, NIGHT CALL NURSES) Peabody, and her two buddies Jonsie (Terry Mace) and Bernie (Clyde Ventura) set off on a journey to find the killer! You have no idea whether it has been days, months or years since the murder and/or how far they're traveling, maybe 5, maybe 200 miles!

By the light of the campfire, here's an introspective look at Dixie Peabody as Dag!

"What the cornbread Hell's going on her anyway?"

The trio stakes their venture on the money Dag makes from being a two-bit hustler!

They try and tantalize the whole scene with some useless nudity and vulgar language to no avail!

It looked like there was a legitimately genuine ugly dust storm at one point during the filming so they took advantage of it!

After smoking some pot, Dag has a weird dream about the killer!

What the Hell?  It's good old Dan (Grizzly Adams) Haggerty as the hippie artiste Ken!
Damn, Dan just passed away two months ago in January of this year! I would have loved to talk to him about the making of this movie!

After tracking him down for God only knows how long, Dag finally corners the killer of her brother!

And what does he have to say in his defense besides "your brother stole my bike?"
 "INCEST!" 
Yecch! Sorry pal, that's no way to win a girl's heart!

Monday, March 14, 2016

THE ANDROMEDA STRAIN / Universal Pictures - 1971

Here's a great movie, one I saw in 1971, a tension fraught thriller, big time!.. When the residents of Piedmont, New Mexico, are found dead after the return to Earth of a space satellite, the head of the US Air Force's Project Scoop declares a state of emergency. Years prior to this incident, a group of eminent scientists led by Dr. Jeremy Stone advocated for the construction of a secure laboratory facility that would serve as a base in the event an alien biological life form was returned to Earth from a space mission. Stone and his team go to the facility known as Wildfire and try to isolate the life form while determining why two people from Piedmont, a wino and a six-month-old baby, survived. The scientists study the alien life form, unaware that it has already mutated and presents a far greater danger in the lab than expected, which is equipped with a nuclear self-destruct device for this type of situation!

I have a nice sound clip for your approval, sooooo, you can push the big red 'GO' button located there by our alien mold shooting gallery, NOW, Ralphie The Tarantula!.. Here's a sample from... THE ANDROMEDA STRAIN!

After authorities locate the grounded satellite in Piedmont, well, it's not a very pretty sight.

The inside of the Wildfire lab is nothing but eye candy and actually a real containment facility.

The incoming doctors and scientists have to go through a series of decontamination safe guards before entering the lab. Here, Dr. Hall gets the top layer of his skin toasted off!

Dr. Hall is also in charge of the old man and the baby found alive in Piedmont.

In the meantime, Dr. Stone and Dr. Leavitt search the satellite scoop for clues to the mystery. A small dent is found and on further inspection using their microscope, they find the culprit.

But, the damned thing is mutating right in front of their eyes!.. Now freakin' what?!

What a cool shot, it looks like an impossible task using those rubber gloves!

UPDATE: The Andromeda Strain just keeps on mutating...

HEY, JERKFACE!!!... No crowding at the bathroom line!

It's up to Dr. Hall to deactivate the self-destruct device, not an easy task!

It's armed with lasers, Dr. Hall gets stung a number of times, including one to the face!

You can hear in the sound clip that the doctor accomplishes the deactivation with eight seconds to spare. The Andromeda Strain has mutated into a less potent enemy, but, what will happen to it in the future?..

Monster Music

Monster Music
AAARRGGHHH!!!! Ya'll Come On Back Now, Y'Hear??