UNIDENTIFIED FLYING OBJECTS / Ivan Tors Productions - 1956

It's Friday wif' Tabonga, here at The Dungeon!.. We gots a fairly rare flick from Ivan Tors who was trying to capitalize on the UFO scare going on in the good old US at the time, poster sez it shows color footage kept 'top secret' until now! Ivan Tors also produced THE MAGNETIC MONSTER, RIDERS TO THE STARS, GOG, SCIENCE FICTION THEATRE, THE AQUANAUTS and FLIPPER.

Eegah!! made a fun lil' soundclip for our approval, soooo, you can push the big red 'GO' button there next to the atomic trap door, NOW, Rufus The Gnat! Here's the audio for... UNIDENTIFIED FLYING OBJECTS!

Tom Towers was hired to give authenticity to this semi-documentary, he was the Aviation Editor for the LA Examiner...

The US Dept. of War, the Pentagram!

Flying saucers are everywhere in the headlines and on the air waves... I was stationed at Fort Lewis in '68 and woke up to Mt. Rainier's majesty every morning, but, never saw any UFOs!

Fake UFO photos were a big fad, even Joe's getting into the act!

Dig it, free coffee for all those alien visitors from outer space!

This kid with the space helmut looks a lot like Tabonga at that age! One time, like in '62, Eegah!! and I dressed up as a psycho clown and a D. J. type villain with a make-up kit his mom got us and then walked to a liquor store and played the pinball machine, I used the right flipper, Eegah!! used the left flipper. The place was connected to a bar and a few drunks came out to take a gander at us!

Here's the part in the soundclip where the old guy tells the reporter about noticing his tie color... "But, you didn't come out of a flying saucer!"

One plane cracks up as they're reporting a saucer sighting, so, there had to be a death ray involved. EARTH vs THE FLYING SAUCERS came out the same year.

There's a lot of pointing up into the sky in this flick.

Life Magazine even featured flying saucers in an article, which was a big deal. Funny thing though, Truman is shown on the cover here, but, that issue actually had Marilyn Monroe on the cover!

The hunt for UFOs is on!!..

The big climax is that tired old archive footage of the cluster of objects roaring past the water tower, in 8mm color, wow!

Well, there you have it! My dad always said that UFOs were man made, I agree... Happy Birthday to Eegah!! and my son, Erik!

TOO HOT TO HANDLE - Eric Spear/Bill McGuffie - "Playgirl After Dark" (1960)

Tonight's feature was originally titled "Too Hot To Handle," but by the time it got to the shores of America, it had already been renamed as the much more insipidly stupid "Playgirl After Dark" which as far as the movie is concerned, actually has no meaning at all!

Okay, I feel kinda ripped off! As you can plainly see, "Too Hot To Handle" was originally released in glorious colour! Now down here in The Dungeon, we love black and white flicks as much, or more than anybody, but if it was in colour to begin with, it sure would have been nice to see it that way, but I guess it has something to do with getting it played on the TV before any colour broadcasts existed!! A year earlier the undisputed #1 blonde bombshell Marilyn Monroe was in a comedy entitled "Some Like It Hot!" Just let me know if you think it's some kind of odd coincidence that "Too Hot To Handle" was released the following year!!!

The weirdest thing is that this is not a bad movie, and it has Jayne Mansfield AND Christopher Lee in it! What a wonderful pair of icons to see on the big screen together!!

Leo Genn is strip club owner Johnny Solo, and that's just the way he likes it, alone! How old do you have to be to know what Leo is doing with his hands? Something quite popular with the kids back in the day that has never been resurrected again as far as I know! Check this out! Leo was in the beyond classic 1956 film "Moby Dick," and his character was known as Starbuck, which means that everything in his possession would be Starbuck's!!

Christopher Lee's character is known as Novak, and he is not only Johnny Solo's right hand man, he's also the MC at Johnny's strip club in Soho known as "The Pink Flamingo!" I wonder what was more eclectic in 1960, Soho, or New York's Greenwich Village?

Jayne Mansfield has the role of Midnight Franklin, Johnny Solo's main squeeze, and the top act in his club!! Johnny's nickname for her is 12 O'Clock!!

"Too Hot To Handle" could easily be considered a film noir musical! Jayne does 4 numbers, and there's a good portion of 4 or 5 of the other girl's acts! The guys in the audience are obviously impressed with Jayne's abundant talents! Va-Va-Voom!! Smoke 'em if you gottem!!

The Soho guys in this act are getting way overheated themselves! The too cool title song, "Too Hot To Handle" was written by Eric (FROZEN ALIVE) Spear, and Bill (DALEK'S INVASION EARTH: 2050 A.D.) McGuffie! Jayne also performs "You Were Made For Me," "Monsoon," and "Midnight!" So why would you change the title to "Playgirl After Dark" when the title song is obviously called "Too Hot To Handle?" Beats the Hell out of me!!

I'm thinking there was some kind of identity crisis in 1960 swingin' England!

Dirty Novak gets a little uptight when Sheldon (13 Demon Street) Lawrence as Diamonds Dielli, the owner of the club across the street named "The Diamond Horseshoe" shows up to talk a little turkey, since Novak is working all the angles and both sides of the street!!

A ransom note is then delivered to Johnny via hatchet mail, but after they make the delivery, the hoodlums find only a satchel full of Midnight's pictures, and no money!

Johnny Solo's got all kinds of class strippers in his joint!! Not as classy as in "The Monster And The Stripper," but class just the same, like this gal and her original 'maybe I'll get out of bed today' act!!

I don't think I need to explain the quantum phenomenon that breaks the conformal symmetry of the classical theory of this scene!

Midnight's act is quite interactive! I hope they kept a doctor on the premises or at least an ambulance out in the parking lot!!

Diamond's boys were pretty pissed off about the whole money switcheroo, and bust up Johnny and his place pretty bad!

But Johnny Solo's a tough old geezer, and if he gets the jump on you instead of vice versa, he's a got a pretty good right, and one mean bitch-slap of a left!

There's only one word to describe this scene, BUSTED!

And now you know where the term 'headlights' is derived from! Good lighting!!

Johnny was pretty cool for the most part, but sometimes he was a cold-hearted sumbitch, so after he basically pimps out one of his girls to one of his fine upstanding customers who turns out to be a psycho, everything goes into the toilet!

The jig is up, and Johnny Solo's gig is over!

Honestly, I didn't realize Jayne Mansfield was such a well-rounded actress! This is not the tale of some high-pitched ditzy blonde, but the story of one strong-willed woman in a sleazy environment! There's no actual nudity, but it's a very well made and risque film for it's time! As a final notation, let me just say that Director Terence Young went on to direct three of the best ever James Bond movies, "Dr. No," "From Russia With Love," and "Thunderball" and maybe that makes more sense!

Here's one last reminder of why they need to release this film in glorious Eastman colour!!!

TABONGA'S TOP 10 Fifties Monster Movies

It's time for something completely different with Tabonga, here at The Dungeon!.. I made a list one time of the monster movies I saw at the theaters during the fifties, I think there were 66 of them, the first one was THE BEAST FROM 20,000 FATHOMS in 1953 that my parents took me to see at the age of five! So, here's a list of my favorite movies I saw when they came out, way back when...

No. 1, FORBIDDEN PLANET - What else?!.. Everything about this movie is top notch, mind blowing for an eight year old, my dad loved sci-fi and took me to see this one. It was all about Robby The Robot and the Id Monster!

No. 2, THE BLOB - I was only ten when my dad took me to see this one! I loved the theme song, still have the 45, but, when Steve sees the doctor covered in the blob through the window, I flipped out. I spent a lot of time in the lobby sitting on a lounge chair, twitching, while my dad kept watching to movie. You could smoke in the theater back then.

No. 3, THE FLY - Another one my dad took me to, I was ten again. This movie was very creepy, and, when the hood covering Al's hideous head is finally pulled off by his wife, well, I fainted! The hairy claw and that twitching fly face, a true terror classic! It's hard for me to watch this one now, it's so damn sad.

No. 4, KRONOS - I totally loved this wild one, it had all the good sci-fi stuff going on including that awesome destroyer of worlds! John Emery was perfect as the scientist taken over by the alien force.

No. 5, THE BLACK SCORPION - I saw a lot of movies with neighborhood kids on Saturday afternoons, we thought this one was great. The close-up of the hero monster growling and slobbering will never be forgotten! They actually turned up the volume for those scenes! I think we sat near the front for this one.

No. 6, TARANTULA! - The best giant spider movie, great process shots, great makeup! What I remember most was Leo G. Carroll in bed as the monster tears the house apart, his contorted face in the shadows!

No. 7, THE 7th VOYAGE OF SINBAD - Oh man, we loved this film so much, a real kid's favorite. It had everything a kid could want, we salute you Ray Harryhausen!!

No. 8, CURSE OF THE DEMON - This is one excellent British horror film, great story that involves magic runes and a giant devilish demon from Hell, and, it only comes out at night!!

No. 9, THE COLOSSUS OF NEW YORK - This was a great movie to see at the time, the Colossus was an amazing piece of work, dude was immense!

No. 10, THE INCREDIBLE SHRINKING MAN - Another excellent movie, but, what I remember the most was feeling lost and very depressed at the end, it's torturess to watch as Grant constantly goes from one bad situation to another!