I MARRIED A MONSTER FROM OUTER SPACE / Paramount Pictures - 1958

Welcome to Monster Monday with Tabonga, here at The Dungeon!.. It's always great, on Mondays, when the word 'monster' is in the title of the movie we're reviewing! Here's an updated version of a previous post...

Pretty cool Mexican lobby card! The budget for this classic sci-fi flick was a whopping $175,000!! It shows, I think a few of the Corman budgets were only like $30,000 each.

One tagline reads... Shuddery things from beyond the stars, here to breed with human women! The other sez... The bride wore terror!

No mention of who did the music. There's a cool tune playing in the bar scene, but, no clue as to by who, so, boo hoo hoo...

It's time to bring in our fuzzy little fiend and Dungeon helper, sure 'nuf, its... Ralphie The Tarantula! Ralphie's raring to go, so, lettuce start the show! Push that big red 'GO' button right in front of you, now, Ralphie! Here's!.. I MARRIED A MONSTER FROM OUTER SPACE!

Here's the girls talking about their favorite subject, what else... SEX! Then, on the other hand, you got the guys at the table, getting lit and loudly telling their favorite fart jokes.

Bill leaves the fun early, he wants to get home and hit the sack, he's getting married tomorrow!

Hey, is that something in the road?..

Everything happens fast, but, if you look at this dummy closely, you will notice that it's extremely weird looking!!.. He got all up in my grill!

It's the old bait and switcheroonie... Bill turns around and meets his new soul mate, then, he gets gassed real good!

Bill's late for his own wedding and bride-to-be, Marge, is having a cow! Gloria Talbott was also in THE CYCLOPS, DAUGHTER OF DR. JEKYLL and THE LEECH WOMAN. Her grandfather was the co-founder of Glendale, CA.

Tom Tryon plays Marge's husband, Tom was in Disney's MOON PILOT.

One of the creepiest parts from the movie, Bill shows the audience his monster side!!

The aliens start recruiting Bill's friends, that way, they can stay in communication and mingle in public with each other without drawing attention to themselves.

One night, Marge follows Bill into the woods and gets to see more than she really wanted to!

She runs to the only place open, the bar. They laugh and mock her when she tells her story, and, the sleazeball with the hat, I swear, is looking at her boobs the whole time!

Here's a familiar face, John Eldredge! He play's her godfather and Police Captain, so, of course, he's one of them!!

DAMN, GLORIA!!.. No wonder the girl's frustrated! This flim was promoted as adult sci-fi.

Bar owner Max asks the alien guys how come they're actin' like ghouls lately and ain't buyin' his liquor?.. They tell him to mind his own business! Max is played by ex-boxer, Max 'Slapsie Maxie' Rosenbloom. His voice is replicated for Pelican, the cat in the Merrie Molodies' cartoon classic, Tuffy's Tavern, written by Michael Maltese, directed by Chuck Jones... Mouse Knuckles!

Max breaks his knuckles on Bill's chin, he's flabbergasted... The bar fly tells him that he's lost his touch!

What, this dizzy broad wants a dollie after the store's closed?!..

Once the people figure out what's going on in their town, they go searching for the aliens in the woods. And, they find 'em!!

The townspeople shoot away, but, it seems to have no effect! The things just absorb the bullets.

The German Shepherds that were brought along attack the aliens and effectively sever the large veins in their necks. But, beware the sting of their disintegration ray!

Good shots of this unique looking, shocking alien monster. That metallic thing in it's mouth always seemed a little out of place, though.

They locate the room with all the hanging bodies of the real versions of the guys who were.. the ones.. that.. got... Hell, you know what I'm tryin' to say!

This is Corporal Zinglethorp calling Supreme Leader Punchy, in space... Dude, they got German Shepherds, abort mission! Repeat, abort mission!!!

Aww... Heck!! Carol, could you bring me the paper towels!

Well, I tried to warn you about those chili burritos, but, would you listen to me? Hell, no!!.. Wowerzs, look how they lit Gloria!

Why was he holding his stomach? And, for that matter, did he even have a stomach?!

The monsters retreat back into outer space... Game over, man!.. Game over!!

PLAYGIRL KILLER - Neil Sedaka - J.B. and the Playboys - "The Waterbug et al" (1968)

It's the Tortured Artiste effect again, pseudointellectual researchers to the metal, and taken to the next level in "Playgirl Killer", a title that makes almost as much sense as the movie itself or the fact that it's been released as "Portrait Of Fear," and/or "Decoy For Terror!"

First things first, Tortured Artiste or not, and even though I do it, everybody knows it's not cool to wear white socks with sandals, unless it's winter, and that's even questionable, so you have to wonder about this guy's sanity right out of the box!

Damn it! He was trying to sketch, and he kept telling her to stop moving around, then the voices in his head started talking to him, something silly was bound to happen! So now we've got a Tortured Artiste on the run, and you wouldn't have much of a movie if he didn't get away!

It's 1968, so it's time to cut to the pool party, and who should be here but Neil Sedaka as Bob, and Linda Christopher as Betty. The last time we heard or saw from Neil Sedaka, he was singing about doing "The Jellyfish" in another classic period piece, "The Sting Of Death!" Neil is either a very good sport or he just has really bad taste, I'm not sure which, maybe both! Linda retired after this gig, and her two previous appearances were as the Receptionist in "Adulterous Affair" and on the TV show "A Go Go '66" as a dancer!

What red blooded male would be foolish enough to turn down this job? Bob puts the lotion on Betty's older sister Arlene played by another Christopher named Jean! Jean was only in 4 productions herself, one of which was the same "Adulterous Affair," and she also had two TV appearances, one on some show called "Nightcap," and once on another show titled "The Party Game!"

Later, when the sun goes down, the music starts cooking, and the opening act is J.B. and the Playboys! It's funny, on IMDB they give one guy, Allan F. Nicholls, credit as the whole band! Allan was a member of the popular 60's Canadian band, but he wasn't the whole band! Part of the reason the band broke up was just because of their name! Besides other changes in the band, they were always getting confused with Gary Lewis and the Playboys, and it just wasn't working out!

Hey, here he is, the headliner, Mr. Neil Sedaka performing "The Water Bug!" Unlike "The Jellyfish" and "The Waterbug," Neil has had some ultra-classic hits over the years like "Oh, Carol," "Calender Girl," "Breaking Up Is Hard To Do," "Happy Birthday Sweet Sixteen," and he had a hit song called "Stairway To Heaven" 11 years before Led Zeppelin!!

Here's where the two parties cross paths, Arlene has volunteered to close the place up and the Tortured Artiste is trying to get the Hell out of Dodge, but the garage door is stuck, so the poor girl needs some help!!

The Tortured Artiste doesn't want to do it, but he begrudgingly stays around to help her, since Arlene is so desperately in need of some attention!! Wink, wink!

Because he's such a freakin wonderful person with an amazingly riveting personality, Arlene ends up posing for him too, and you don't have to have a lot of imagination to know where this is headed!!

The Tortured Artiste has lots of symbolically bad dreams! So what?!? I had a dream last night that I was given front row seats at a major concert, and there was a big mix up on the seats, and the band onstage finally told me to sit down, and I didn't kill anybody today!

Actually, he didn't kill Arlene during that sitting, the script calls for them to have a night in the sack first in order to sleaze the whole thing up a notch!

This innocent gal shows up fresh off the bus, and tortured boy talks her into putting on one of Arlene's bathing suits, and going for a swim with him!! Bad choice!

The Tortured Artiste's name is Bill, and he is one of the few people in this film with any real credits! So who is this crazy guy who mastered the one raised eyebrow psycho look years before The Rock! It's William Kerwin, who among other things, before this, had a fine run of weirdness with Herschell Gordon Lewis that included "Boin-n-g," "Blood Feast," "Goldilocks And The Three Bares," "Bell, Bare And Beautiful," and "Scum Of The Earth" etc. William racked up a total of 146 roles before passing on in 1989!

He jumped in the Caddie and drove afar!!!

Bill is now officially on a spree, and it's time for him to get out and mingle, so he heads on over to the Royal Embassy Hotel to catch Nikki's act!! Nikki was portrayed by Andrée Champagne!

In a major contribution to the 'Go Figger" department, Andrée Champagne was appointed to the Canadian Senate on August 2, 2005 as a conservative!

Andrée has also served in Canadian government as assistant chair of the Committee of the Whole House of Commons!

Andrée was also Deputy Speaker of the House of Commons!

She has also been Minister of State for Youth and Amateur Sport! What a gal!!

"You're not an artist, you're insane!" There's always that fine line, and that quote pretty much sums up the whole thing!

Gauguin... Van Gogh... Manson... Bill....... for more information, head on over to The Trash Palace!!! What a Bug!!