IL PROFUMO DELLA SIGNORA IN NERO - Francesco Barilli - "The Perfume Of The Lady In Black" (1974)

 Lord Litter turned me on to tonight's Saturday Night Special, and I'll tell you the exact same thing I told him, Whatinthemotherfuckinsonofabitchinhell was that? Whoa!

"Il Profumo Della Signora In Nero" is one of THE weirdest movies I have seen lately, and I guess if I was a true researcher I would go and read what others might have to say as far as explaining a lot of it, but I don't really have time to do that, and besides, it's all just mush to me anyway! There is more than one kind of weird movie, and by weird I don't mean so cheap and stoopid that it's unwatchable, au contraire, this film is visually stunning, intriguing, and intelligent! I just didn't know what the Hell was going on most of the time, but it was still very interesting to watch! It poses many unanswered questions, and it's a freak fest!

Mimsy Farmer is Silvia Hacherman! Sylvia is a very complicated character, in fact I'm not really sure if she is a character in this film, but more of a metaphor for all kinds of things instead!

 This is the odd place that Silvia works. The movie starts off innocent enough, but then they throw everything out the window, or literally over the edge along with Silvia's Mother!

Silvia's friends and her lover are all very strange! You never know what's going on, but you know something ain't right, especially when they are not around her! There's something going on for sure!

 Silvia's boyfriend has a very cool blue Volkswagen convertible, and as you can see, most of the time the surroundings are very opulent!!

 This is Silvia's weird nightstand with a Mickey Mouse alarm clock, and a little ugly figurine that seems very important to her for some reason that will never be revealed!

Unusual people are watching Silvia, and you don't know why, or what their connection is to the other weird people she's surrounded by!

Mimsy is truly great through the whole mess! Silvia's life is a tangle of reality, bad dreams, morose memories, guilt, and fear!

Here are just a couple of random shots to show you all the amazing attention paid to details in this film! Visual details that is, not story line details!

Once the weird ball gets rolling, it just keeps picking up speed, and it's all headed straight downhill for Silvia!

Silvia's Mother is either a whore, or just has extremely bad taste in men! As a little girl, Silvia caught them in the act, and stabbed this dude in the face near his eye, and it's a very haunting memory for Silvia!

One thing that isn't weird is Silvia's cool record player!

Silvia's seemingly rather droll but kind neighbor is anything but that description, and is really a super weirdo! The neighbor was played by Mario Scaccia.

This is Silvia's neighbor Francesca, and even though you can't really tell by this shot, she actually isn't that weird! Francesca was played by Donna Jordan in the last of her two title credits. This movie might have done it!

Why are these varied people with nothing in common, all dressed up in lab coats and walking into this weird tunnel??

Then this super freaky little girl shows up? Is she real? Is she a hallucination? Is she Silvia as a little girl, a dream, a weird imaginary friend? Good luck!! The little girl was played by Lara (Ghosthouse) Wendel!

 Mimsy Farmer's performance here is every bit as good as Audrey Hepburn's in "Wait Until Dark!" 

"Il Profumo Della Signora In Nero" is the first full length movie directed by Francesco Barilli, who also has a sister who is a costume designer named Eveline, a great Uncle Bruno who is an actor, a first cousin once removed named Cecrope who is an actor, and a second cousin named Carlotta who is an actress! It's a movie kind of family!
I will not disclose the end of this movie even if it was freakin' 43 years ago. Some things you just need to find out on your own, so here you go!
Knock Yourself Out!!

MYSTERY ON MONSTER ISLAND / Almena Films, F. Ariza, Fort Films Productions - 1981

Here's a weak Jules Verne story all about a young European lad living in San Francisco, he's reluctant to marry his long time girlfriend because he wants to travel around the world first. His wealthy uncle agrees to send him on a global expedition aboard his ship, but, en route he and his travelling companion are shipwrecked on a remote island, populated by countless prehistoric creatures as well as gold-hunting bandits!

This thing stars Terence (MODESTY BLAISE, SPIRITS OF THE DEAD) Stamp and Peter (THE CURSE OF FRANKENSTEIN, THE SKULL) Cushing with a cast of lesser known actors...

Peter plays Mr. Kolderup, he buys a tropical island for five million dollars at an auction. Terence Stamp plays his rival, Taskinar, who also wants the island because he knows a treasure of gold is hidden there, but he loses the bid.

So, Kolderup sends his nephew, Jeff (Ian Sera), to the island on a boat along with his teacher, Professor Artelect (David Hatton), but on the way there, they meet up with this super scary sea monster!.. Check out those highly detailed eyeballs.

Then, Jeff and the Professor get shipwrecked and end up on Monster Island anyway.

On the island, Jeff and the Professor come across some natives ready to slit the throat of one of their own! Our guys step in and save the dude and he becomes part of the gang. The thing that bugs me the most about this movie is the freakin' Professor's spastik reaction to absolutely everything that happens. I wanted him to get killed after 10 minutes, but, had to suffer through the whole 100 minute story without satisfaction!! DAMN IT!!!

Here are some of the monsters on the island, you can see the care taken in their creation!

Our guys meet a girl wandering around and she invites them to stay at her place. She puts a record on and does the twist with Jeff!!.. Let me out of here!!

These weirdos are seen wandering through the forest... I wonder what they look like?

WTF?!!.. You gotta be kidding, jeez!! Hey, costume designer!! YOU'RE FIRED!!!

It looks bad for the good guys! But, their native buddy, Carefinatu, saves them from whatever the weirdos have in store for them!

Then, the volcano 'splodes and our gang takes shelter in a cave, followed by the weirdos.

Finally, Kolderup shows up in his ship to save our guys from the many dangers on the island,

Well anyway, the weirdos are ready to shoot everyone when they are attacked by some small missiles! The day is saved when Kolderup's cook has Taskinar and his pals surrender to the authorities. Our goofball Professor still has many more embarrassing scenes to overact in before the ending credits roll. Okay, there you go, join us again tomorrow when Eegah!! will have a specialty item to share, later dudeskis!

Dungeon Bulletin... It's looking like Eegah!! and I should have taken Russian in high school instead of German! Stoopid kidz!!

THE CAT IN "NAUGHTY BUT MICE" vs. JACK WESTON in "A DIP IN THE POOL"

Tonight I've got a Wacky Wednesday Grudge Match between  "Tales Of The Unexpected".....

........And Paramount Studio's "Noveltoons!"

Who will be the winner? 

"A Dip In The Pool"..........

.........Or, "Naughty But Mice?"

The "Tales Of The Unexpected" team is led by Roald Dahl!

And the "Noveltoons" team is managed by Herman The Mouse!

Jack (Captain Video and His Video Rangers) Weston is the star of "A Dip In The Pool," a story about a man with a gambling problem!

Jack was also in two original "Twilight Zone" classics, "The Monsters Are Due On Maple Street,' and "The Bard," and in 1953-54 he was Wilbur "Wormsey" Wormser in 58 episode of "Rod Brown of the Rocket Rangers!"

Jack's opponent is the reigning Mouse Catcher Champion, The Cat!

They both take some big punches in the opening rounds!

How much punishment can they possibly take?

In the end, it's a double knockout!!

Jack ends up at the bottom of the ocean, and the cat ends up in the bottom of a well, and the bout is ruled to be 'no contest!'

Happy Drink A 5th Of July!!