Wednesday, July 13, 2011

LUST FOR A VAMPIRE - Harry Robertson/Frank Godwin/Tracy - "Strange Love" (1971)

As our pal Christopher so deftly pointed out, the Karnstein family of evil has been around for quite a while, serving up all kinds of nastiness! Long before the "Twins Of Evil" ever made the scene, there was a film released in 1964 titled "Crypt Of The Vampire" that starred Christopher Lee as Count Ludwig Karnstein, then in 1970 there was "The Vampire Lovers" that starred the marvelous Ingrid Pitt as Mircalla Karnstein, which brings us to tonight's feature released in 1971, right before the "Twins" that was called "Lust For A Vampire" and starred Mr. Mike Raven as Count Karnstein, and by no means should "Lust For A Vampire" get confused with the Mario Bava film that came out in 1956 called "Lust Of The Vampire," or "I, Vampiri!"

Even before the opening credits roll, the first sacrificial lamb is abducted with a closeup shot that you will notice gets used quite frequently throughout the whole picture!

It takes a lot of blood to awaken the ancient carcass of Carmilla/Mircalla which is understandable once you witness the transformation!

Literally the man in black, Mike Raven is Count Karnstein, the guy in charge of calling all the shots! Mike Raven was a popular Saturday night rhythm and blues DJ for a time in the UK, something that led insult to injury when they dubbed in his voice in "Lust For A Vampire" using the voice of veteran actor Valentine Dyall instead! Creepy Mike also starred in and helped finance "Crucible Of Terror," and "Disciple Of Death," and also was in "I, Monster." That's it, four films and on to be a sculptor and sheep farmer! What a guy!!

Just in case you thought things couldn't get any worse for Mike, in this closeup of Count Karnstein, they used Christopher Lee's eyes instead of Mike Raven's! Ouch!!

At least all that blood didn't go to waste, as Carmilla/Mircalla arises from her 40 year nap, lookin' pretty damned good!!

The locals are never too happy when a stranger comes to town, especially when there's been a string of murders of young nubiles going on!

Not wanting to mind his own business, and snooping around, the stranger has apparently run into a brood of hooded devil worshipers!!

Turns out it was only a bunch of beautiful girls from the local finishing school just out playing around!

As it states in the dreadful trailer, "Welcome to the finishing school, where they really do finish you!!"

I thought "Lust For A Vampire" was going to be just a soft-core vampire boobfest, and don't get me wrong, it does have it's fair share of pairs, but for the most part, "Lust For A Vampire" is misnamed, and is actually intelligent, and not too bad of a film! The newest student at the school is none other than a lovely young lady named Mircalla, who gets a little massage here from one of the other students!

The music used in "Lust For A Vampire" was written by a certain Mr. Harry Robertson, working here as Harry Robinson! Among his incredible accomplishments, Harry wrote the music for the 1960's musical variety TV show "Shindig!" In 1958 Harry had a chart topping hit for three weeks with a little ditty called "Hoots Mon" that was performed by Harry and his band working as Lord Rockingham's XI!!

The stranger that came to town was the guy on the right, Michael Johnson as author Richard Lestrange! With that hairdo, Richard looks like a cross between Chuck Barris of "The Gong Show" fame and some UK rocker! Most of Michael's work was for TV, starting his career in 1959 on "Manhunt," and closing it out in 1990 on "Perfect Scoundrels!" The Tiny Tim lookin' guy on the left is Jonathan Cecil as the new teacher Biggs!

Sly dog Richard has just tricked Biggs into leaving, so he can go teach at the girl's school in his place, and have all the girls to himself, and he is particularly interested in the one named Mircalla!

I honestly don't ever recall seeing this many closeups of different kinds in one movie lately!!

Ozzy Osbourne lookalike is Ralph Bates as Giles Barton! Giles has a skull on his desk because he's the spineless Headmaster at the school!! Ralph was the real life great, great nephew of Louis Pasteur, and was in a number of Hammer films like "Horror Of Frankenstein," "Taste The Blood Of Dracula," and "Dr Jekyll & Sister Hyde!"

The gorgeous Dane Yutte Stensgaard is heavenly evil in the role of Carmilla/Mircalla! The former au pair changed her first name from Jytte to Yutte to make it easier for people to pronounce! Yutte's first appearance was in the 1968 film, "La Ragazza Con La Pistola," or "The Girl With The Pistol," she was also Robot Number Two in the Bulldog Drummond feature, "Some Girls Do," and was Erika in "Scream And Scream Again!" Unfortunately for us, Yutte got fed up with the whole scene and quit acting in 1973!

Comparing the olde and new, it's all starting to make sense now!

The only real problem is that even though Richard knows the truth about Carmilla/Mircalla, and here's the catch, the crazy guy's in love with her!!!

Stranger than anything I'd ever heard of in any Hammer vampire flick before, there's actually a pretty cool and moody little tune right in the middle of this big love making scene that musically puts this movie heads and pierced throats above your normal vampire film! The song was called "Strange Love," and was performed by Tracy! The music was written by Harry Robertson, and the lyrics were written by Frank Godwin!

As you watch Mircalla's eyes roll into the back of her head, you can listen to "Strange Love" as it was released as a single! It appears for all rights and purposes that Richard was quite the lover!!

It's amazing, Carmilla/Mircalla doesn't even bite him, because she's actually in love with him too! Now that's a twist, an undead person with a heart!

So they bring in Jack Melford as The Bishop, and it's a whopping big red on red ordeal. This would be Jack Melford's last appearance, as he died a few months later! He'd been acting since 1931!

The only real reason they brought The Bishop into the story was so that he could try to stop the villagers from burning up The Karnsteins, because he's the only one intelligent enough to know that it only burns their physical bodies, and that their undead souls will return to do more mayhem and damage to the innocent unless they get a stake through the heart!

Carmilla/Mircalla on the other hand wasn't as lucky as the other Karnsteins, and the living dead game is over for her!

Saturday, July 9, 2011

TWINS OF EVIL - Harry Robertson - "Twofer One Special" (1971)

You got lucky this time because No, "Twins Of Evil" is not about Tabonga! and Eegah!! The title is a bit of a misnomer because although the film is about twins, basically really only one is evil!

All the guys who live in this town need to get a life or find a hobby because right now they spend all their time getting together and burning young innocent girls at the stake who they are convinced are evil, when it ain't necessarily so! This is why guys today play golf and join fraternal institutions of brotherhood like The Lions or The Rotary Club!

This time around Peter Cushing is Brother Gustav Weil, the leader of the gang! Gustav has got some real issues, and is a bit overzealous in his pursuit of destroying all the evil in the world, one woman at a time!! If Gustav's life isn't miserable enough already, it's just getting ready to get worse!!

Gustav's recently orphaned twin nieces have just arrived at his cottage to live with him, and it creates problems on multiple levels! Let's just say to start with, Gustav is frantic just with the fact that they are not wearing black! Playboy centerfolds from the October 1970 issue Mary and Madeleine Collinson, were the first twin playmates! Frieda Gellhorn is played by Madelaine and her equally lovely sister Maria Gellhorn is played by Mary Collinson!! These sisters are so cute that it falls into the 'Evil? Who Cares?' department!

Meanwhile, over on the other side of town, we've got a completely different pageant of unholy behavior happening at the castle of the local freak Count Karnstein! Damien Thomas is Count Karnstein! Damien has been working steady for years and was in a film released this year called "Grave Tales."

Count Karnstein has accidently just revived the spirit of vampiress Countess Mircalla through the miracle of human sacrifice!

With Mircalla's assistance, Count Karnstein has been reborn, and is now among the legions of the undead!

Kathleen Byron has the role of Gustav's poor wife, Katy Weil! Kathleen did a ton of British TV, was an angel in a 1946 film titled "Stairway To Heaven," and was also in "Black Narcissus," "Hell Is Sold Out," and "Burn, Witch, Burn!"

We normally sidestep nudity, but this photo has almost Mona Lisa like qualities, and by applying contemporary community standards, is not deemed by me to be obscene! Besides it's just one out of four!

Frieda is drawn to the light of Count Karnstein's castle like a fly to a spider's web and will soon be ensnared in his booby trap of abomination!

So who are the real "Twins Of Evil?" Is it really the two beautiful young sisters, or is it actually the two bozoheaded bastards Gustav Weil and Count Karnstein?

"Twins Of Evil" is a fine lookin' film and I'm sure it has a lot to do with the work of the Director Of Photography, the man whose parents must have had a good sense of humour, Dick Bush!

The music in this film was composed by Harry Robertson or Harry Robinson, with a lot of help from one of the busiest guys to ever run a music department, Phillip Martell! Harry Robertson has 59 credits including "The Oblong Box," "The Johnstown Monster," "Countess Dracula," and "Legend Of The Werewolf!" Phillip Martell has 162 credits working as music supervisor, conductor or musical director that include almost every picture ever made by Hammer Studios. The list is almost endless with titles like "Frankenstein Created Woman," The Deadly Bees," "Five Million Years To Earth," "Dracula Has Risen From The Grave," "Frankenstein Must Be Destroyed" and on and on and on! Phillip was THE man!!!

The Collinson sisters do a fantastic job!! It's always refreshing to see some different faces on the screen, and it makes the film just that much more appealing!!

It shouldn't come as no surprise that Peter Cushing, besides being one of the most amazing actors of all time, was also an accomplished artist in drawing and painting, and his hobby was bird watching!

The Collinson sisters left their mark on the neck of the world! These days Mary lives in Milan, Italy, and Madeleine resides in Malta with their respective families! Thanx to our friends over at the RETroZONe, you can see what all the original hubbub was about right HERE!!

Waiting in between incinerations and bored to tears, the rest of the boys in the band sit around and wait for the Next episode of "SpongeBob" to come on!!!

You know, as bad as Count Karnstein looks and feels right here, I'm certain that if he could talk, he would tell you it was all very much worth it!

Monster Music

Monster Music
AAARRGGHHH!!!! Ya'll Come On Back Now, Y'Hear??