DIARY OF A MAD HOUSEWIFE - Alice Cooper - (What's The Consequence To Be Free?) (1970)

"Diary Of A Madman" with Vincent Price came out in 1963, and was a pretty scary movie, so when "Diary Of A Mad Housewife" came out in 1970, I had high hopes for a similar viewing experience! Boy, was I wrong! Not that it's a bad movie, and even though some of these characters really deserve it, nobody gets killed or even modestly threatened, because "Diary Of A Mad Housewife" is not a horror movie, unless you count the horrors of a modern society! So why is this film on this site?

Here's the happy couple! Richard (WESTWORLD, CATCH-22) Benjamin as stick up his ass attorney Jonathan Balser, and Carrie (THE FURY, TRICK OR TREATS) Snodgress as his misunderstood wife Tina Balser!

The prefect family with the prefect spoiled and brattiest kids on the face of the planet, but there's something weird going on here, between the two of them, Frannie Michel as Liz Balser, and Lorraine Cullen as Sylvie Balser, they only have a total of 6 more acting credits! This film might have had that kind of effect!

So off the Balsers go to party with the innest of the in crowd, and it's pretty obvious who needs to smooze, and who would rather just go back home!

At the arty farty coolest of the cool party they couldn't get The Velvet Underground, so the next band of choice was none other than ALICE COOPER!!

Tina Balser is totally turned off by the sexual arrogance of Frank (DRACULA) Langella as hip author George Prager!

Alice Cooper "Pretties For You" one more time!! That pillow over there turns into one monstrous pillow fight!! The Alice Cooper band was fleshed out by Michael Bruce on guitar, Glen Buxton on guitar, Dennis Dunaway on bass, and drummer Neal Smith!

You'd have to be John Holmes to be a bigger dick that Richard Benjamin in this flick!

At the next "Be there of Be square" party they go to, Tina Balser runs in to George Prager again, and he starts really coming on strong to her! Her stupid husband is just so proud of the fact that she can hang with somebody so intellectually superior, nothing else matters!

This is what it looks like when rich dicks are sick!

I once knew a really nice older man named Richard Peters! One of the last times I saw him, he was wearing a Cox cable hat! He had no idea!

In 1970, if you were exceptionally cool, you had one of these power shoe shiners!

You know you've made it when a Nobel Prize winner steals your shit! Jonathan throws a big party to try and impress the top of the heap, but as luck would have it, everything he pays big bucks for is already passé, and the omelets by the best chef who didn't show up, are already last year's model! Who the Hell serves omelets at a party anyway? Unless they had caviar and lobster in them, I make a better one here every Sunday morning for about nine thousand dollars less!

Very simple but effective shot from Director Frank Perry and Cinematographer Gerald Hirschfeld!

Tina finally cuts loose, and lets her husband know how she really feels about all his bullshit!!

The seductively sweet and stunning Carrie Snodgress (For years I thought it was Snotgrass), undresses and gets dressed again at least 4 or 5 times in this film, and that's not such a bad thing! Carrie was rocker Neil Young's girlfriend for four years, and was the Mother of their son Zeke! She passed away in 2004 at an age of 59, which I consider very young!

The last word is that if Tina was really such a mad housewife, she would have pulled out a giant butcher knife and done away with both her annoying husband, and her eloquent and embarrassing assholish lover, and got away with it, but instead she ends up in therapy with Peter (THE DREAM TEAM, THE MONITORS) Boyle! I doubt it's a coincidence that this film is almost impossible to find!

THE CURSE OF THE WEREWOLF - Benjamin Frankel - "Who Said Life Was Fair?" (1961)

When we first started this blog, we hadn't planned on using very many Hammer flicks, because, let's face it, the eras that most Hammer films were shot in, don't really lend themselves to rockin' or swingin' elements! But, we have re-discovered that it's pretty hard to say 'Horror' or 'Terror' musically without getting pretty weird, and weird is something we have always enjoyed around here, which brings us around to tonight's feature, and a real classic, lovin' that howl from "The Cursed Werewolf!" Too bad the soundclip is no longer available!!

"Curse Of The Werewolf" is about a raging concept that has been going on since time immemorial, the battle between the rich and the poor, and how both sides always get screwed in the end in one way or another!! This is the pompous ass behind the whole thing, a wonderfrul actor by the name of Anthony Dawson, who does a horribly dispicable job as The Marques Siniestro! It's his wedding day, and he doesn't really like being disturbed!! The Marquis' blushing bride, The Marquesa, is played by Josephine Llewellyn in the second of the only two roles she ever took on. Maybe the pressure of having four L's in her name was just too much, or maybe it was just the goose!!

Enter a nameless beggar looking for a handout, played by Richard Wordsworth, who disrupts the party just enuf to piss off the Marquis, who then proceeds to throw him into jail forever! Check out The Marquis' Dawg Pound!!

Mr. Beggar ain't lookin' that swell after a many years in the hole!

And one day, the little servant girl, played by Yvonne Romain, who has been feeding him for years, once again, pisses off The Marquis, and gets tossed into the cell with Mr. Beggar! You'd a thought he would have had mercy on her since she's the only one who has ever cared about him at all, but No, he's just an animal now, and sexually ravages her! Now, how exactly that combination of DNA creates a werewolf offspring is up for debate, but that is what happens!

The Marquis keeps busy like all guys in charge, and now spends all his time making these very serious decisions!!

Have or have not, payback is a bitch!

The servant girl got away, had a baby boy, and dies. The boy gets adopted, grows up farily normal and turns into Leon Corledo, portrayed by, the one, and only, Oliver Reed!

Martin Mathews as Jose Amadayo, is Leon's new friend and co-worker!!! Jose is quite the horny cut-up!!!

Jose convinces Leon to go out with him, and have a good time dancing and drinking at a nice respectable place!! Hey, donde esta Sancho Lopez??

But Leon doesn't seem to enjoy dancing as much as his father did!!

Oliver Reed is one of many heroes we've got here in The Dungeon, and "The Curse Of The Werewolf" is one of the many reasons why!!

Makeup artist extraordinaire Roy Ashton is the man to thank for how cool Oliver looks as the wolfman. Roy did the makeup on so many Hammer films, it will make your head spin, because, Roy was The Guy!!!

The composer for the music used in "Curse Of The Werewolf" was Mr. Benjamin Frankel, a brilliant man who we haven't had a chance to talk about before, because he didn't do much work on horror films, but who had been working on music in the movies since 1934!!!!