WEDNESDAY THE 13TH - "Vintage Halloween Commericals" (1970's & 80's)

 

It's a Wednesday the 13th in The Dungeon Countdown to Halloween, and here's a bunch of imagery from Halloween TV commercials from the deep dark past for you to peruse!

I don't know about you but when I think about PAAS, it's because of their Easter Egg coloring kits, not monster make-up kits!

I guess if you're in a business that is geared only to a specific holiday, it's probably a good thing to branch out into other holidays too.

In 1986 into 1987, specially marked boxes of Quaker's Granola Dipps contained flexi-discs, one of which was by John Lennon.

This commercial was touting Granola Dipps as hauntingly wholesome Halloween treats, with a Beach Boys style theme song, that sounds a lot like "Barbara Ann."

 

 

Oh, No!

These days, Granola Dipps are called Chewy Dipps!

These Halloween Zingers came with a special box!

Cut up that box, and transform an average pumpkin into some kind of Halloween monstrosity!

Believe it or not, but this is from a commercial for Hershey's Kisses.

 

This is an especially freaky commercial! This guy is at a Halloween costume party as a giant chicken!

Everybody at the party, including Frankenstein, is eating fried chicken.

No wonder he's not comfortable, it's a "Big Chicken Deal" for $1.99, and since he's the only big chicken in the room............

"Halloween's coming, what you gonna do about it?" Hallmark's "Spooky Sounds" tape might just be the answer!

This is a commercial for Woolworths. You can tell how old it is by the prices!

Wow, how realistic can you get?

This was an ad for a scary Halloween record called "Sounds To Make You Shiver."

This is from a commercial for a "Safe Halloween." Instead of candy or apples with razor blades in them, it was a coupon you could take to some retail outfit, and cash it in for some candy.

Today the "Safe Halloween" coupon has been replaced by Amazon gift cards!

This is from a Pillsbury commercial.

This 1988 Spooky Goop commercial is just the best!

If it's all fun and nobody gets hurt or dies, it just doesn't get better than monster makeup! 

I'm sure Spooky Goop is a fave with the Kardashian crowd!

 

I grabbed all these stills from just the first thirteen minutes of this video on Youtube called "70's & 80's Halloween Commercials," and if you want to see more, there's another half hour's worth, so dig in freaks!

DUNGEON HALLOWEEN COUNTDOWN Celebration Round-Up

Well, here's the round-up after 11 days into our Halloween Countdown Celebration, here at The Dungeon!!.. Today, things started off with a big BANG!

It all began when one of our invited costumed participants, The Loner, went into the fireworks shed for a smoke!

Then this uninvited group of disrupters tried to get over our magnetic fence!

Sometimes our participants in the celebration get into their character with too much gusto, like here on our roller coaster ride where The Meanie chokes out one of the attendees.

Realizing what he had done, The Meanie revives the guy and begs him not to report him to the authorities! So, the guy didn't report him, but it cost The Meanie $75. Lesson learned? Who knows, there are still 20 days left to go before Halloween.

Here's some funny stuff. One little punk, The Irritator, kept messing with this older gentleman, Space Fountain, calling him old and out of touch and to get with it, and that he was no match for the awesome modernized power of The Irritator, which set off the Fountain...

So, old Space Fountain uses his super-hydrant arm to send The Irritator high into the air where he flails around like a dummy on top of the fountain of water, helpless to get down! What was even more embarrassing is that The Irritator was stuck up there for a full 15 minutes! Then Space Fountain just shuts the stream off and the little shit falls down on his face. The crowd was laughing their asses off!!

Another over zealous monster guy, Rat Crap, took things too far when he threatened some children with getting cut to pieces! The idiot was fined $500, had to spend the day working in the mess hall, and has to wear an ankle monitor for the remainder of the celebration!!

Speaking of the children, well, we held a monster art contest with some pretty talented kids participating, this one got 1st place for its originality, called Faucet Freak.

2nd Place went to this creepy thing called Bat Brain. These kids are good!

Here's 3rd place, it's a crazy looking creature called Spider Mama. After the boy got his ribbon, his mom pulled him away and grounded him for drawing women's breasts on a monster, because, he's only 7 years old!!

These two 'opponents'  give a demonstration of fighting on top of a speeding truck, to thrill the spectators (especially the ladies) with this dangerous stunt. But once they got around the corner, the truck had to swerve for a crashed motorcycle and the two guys were thrown off and rolled down a ravine into a big mud puddle! Go figure!

This was cool, the cameraman got just the right angle to catch this shot of Kick Girl but ended up in the ER after she kicked him in the face when she came down right on him!

So we've already started the voting on the most popular costumed monsters, and here are some getting the least amount of votes! No one can figure out what the Hell is going on with this creation, the Tomato Juice Intruder. All it did was make people thirsty for a glass of tomato juice! The TJI has a total of 6 votes so far.

Here's McBurgler, all he does is make people hungry for a big old juicy burger! He has a total of 3 votes at this point in the event.

And coming in last with no votes so far is The Incredible Whatzit!.. And you can see why, we'll be back Friday with more Dungeon Halloween Countdown antics, later!

SNL - "Vincent Price's Halloween Special" (2008)

Here's a cool little Countdown To Halloween "Saturday Night Live" Special for you.

 

"Vincent Price's Halloween Special" was a sketch from the October 25, 2008 show starring Bill Hader in the role as the host, Vincent Price. Bill is an incredibly talented fellow, who besides his 161 credits on Saturday Night Live, is also an active voice over artist, doing voices in everything from "Aqua Teen Hunger Force" and "South Park," to "Toy Story 4," and "The Simpsons."

Vincent is joined in this sketch by Kristen Wiig as Gloria Swanson, and Jon Hamm as James Mason.

Besides her 139 appearances on "Saturday Night Live," Kristin Wiig is also a voice over artist who was the voice of Lola on "The Looney Tunes Show." Among other things, she co-wrote and starred in the popular film "Bridesmaids." 

Jon Hamm was not a cast member of SNL, but he did appear in six episodes. He's been a voice over artist in cartoons like "Spongebob Squarepants," and "Family Guy." He was also the star of the Hit TV show "Madmen."

 

Just in case you don't know, here's what the real Gloria Swanson looked like in "Sunset Boulevard."

And this is what James Mason really looked like in "Lolita."

Kristen's portrayal of Gloria Swanson is over the top hilarious.

 

Bill does a pretty good job with the Vincent Price one raised eyebrow look!

The hilarious Fred Armisen is also in there as Liberace. Fred was in 236 SNL episodes, and yes, he is also a voice over artist having done voices on "Squidbillies," "Los Espookys," "Archer," and he was the voice of Speedy Gonzales on "The Looney Tunes Show." Quite a versatile guy, Fred was also a drummer in the band Trenchmouth in the 90's.

Gloria and James were supposed to be in costume, and she claims to be a pirate.

Trick or treaters show up at the door. The little girl is a Princess and James Mason asks the boy "if he is dressed as some brand of homosexual" to which the young man exclaims, "You're mean, I want my Mom" and perennial ladies man James replies "That makes two of us!"

 

So that's it, six minutes and thirty-three seconds of nothing but Halloweenie fun, that anybody can watch for free right HERE!

DUNGEON HALLOWEEN COUNTDOWN Celebration Check-In

So, we're checking in on the action after 8 days of celebration, fights and accidents, here at The Dungeon!.. And contrary to popular belief, yes, The Dungeon is a real place!!

We start off our check-in with these five precision costumed daredevils taking a dive off a tall building, look at that beautiful form!!

Just amazing what talent these guys have! Unfortunately, perfect form didn't help them much when they hit the ground!!

Some of our participants are just nuts. Here are a few guys flying around, doing flips and twists, using their hi-tek trampolines to get super bounces. It was a crack up though when they would miscalculate and crash into one another! I mean.. Hilarious hilarious!!

Here are two more dramatic jumps from crazy people, but at least these guys landed on the people below to soften the falls. One of the jumpers broke his nose and the other one lost a few fingers. Other than that they were fine, but thirteen observers on the ground got hurt pretty bad.

Oh yeah, we got our virtual giant robot battle game working after a few bugs had to be exterminated and the kids lined up in droves to command the battle of the giants.

The kids can have the giants punch it out or even stomp on houses! The game will do anything their little untethered brains can conceive! Oh, to be a kid again!

They can have all kinds of fun with their minds, and destroy lots of buildings to boot.

It really is a a kick to watch some of the battles these little brainiacs come up with, we could all learn something from them... ?

Also for the kids was this super ninja dance move demonstration by two professional costumed dancers here for the celebration.

Oh, there were a few problems too. These two participants are looking for someone who made fun of them, to exact their revenge on. All they know is, his name is... Allen!

Here's Allen on his cycle, that uses jet fuel, making a run for it. Besides the two others looking for him, Allen's being followed by a guy who's bike he kicked over, and is now chasing with a bazooka. Allen hasn't been seen for two days.

Ouch! There was another incident where a giant monster stepped on a cameraman. The poor guy is pretty flat but remember, we have a whole staff of mad scientists here to assist in situations like this (and other situations just as bad).

And, Sooper-Rooter is available for unclogging your drains, just give him a ring and he'll come a runnin'... Call 313-1313 NOW!!