Saturday, October 30, 2010

SEIZURE - Lee Gagnon - "It's A Children's Story" (1974)

Okay Kids, here ya go, Happy Halloween! We have not come to praise, we are here to bury "Seizure!" "The evil that men do lives after them, the good is oft interred with their bones!!" Right on Bill!!

"Seizure" is not Shakespeare, but is indeed based on the story of Faust written by German author Johann Wolfgang Goethe! It is an amazing piece of film history, not as a movie per se, but for who was involved in the making of it! Just to start with, it's the first film ever made by writer/director extraordinaire, Oliver Stone, and if the main guy looks familiar to you freaks, it's because it's none other than Jonathan(Barnabas Collins)Frid, the star of all 594 episodes of the TV vampire soap opera "Dark Shadows!" Jonathan is Edmund Blackstone, writer of children's books!

The third, but actually first reason to see this movie, is because Mary Woronov is in it! Mary is one of the most stunning and statuesque women with a sense of humor to ever grace the silver screen, and major Dungeon Heroin(e)! Here she's amazing, as Mikki Hughes, so what else do you need to know?

Joseph Sirola is the extremely rich and obnoxious husband of Mikki, Charlie Hughes! Joseph is probably better known for his voice-over work. He's done tons of commercials and was the voice of Dr. Doom in the Fantastic Four cartoons!

Extremely intelligent people, renting this car was probably one of the biggest expenses incurred in the making of "Seizure!"

Edmund sketches out all of the unsavory characters in his book, you see, he's writing a horror story for kids, and this is "The Queen Of All Evil!"

All the relatives have got together at The Blackstone's home in the country for the weekend, and what a grand group it is!!

The array of psychotronic star power in this flick never quits! 60's teen heart throb Troy Donahue is Mark Frost, Mikki's lover, but this is a far cry from "A Summer's Place!" Troy's real name was Merle Johnson Jr. and he was ranked #10 on a list of TV's 25 Greatest Teen Idols!

Does it stop there? Hell No!! Not to be outdone by any Mexican movies, how about Hervé Villechaize himself, as Spider, The Dwarf!

Edmund Blackstone is about to have a major WTF?! moment as all the vile and evil characters in his book and dreams, come to life! Did you know that besides this film and "Dark Shadows," Jonathan Frid only acted in two other movies, "House Of Dark Shadows," as none other than Barnabas Collins, and TV movie "The Devil's Daughter!"

Mary/Mikki doesn't really give a rat's ass, and is most likely wondering where Andy and The Velvet Underground were when she really needed them!

If I had a time machine, here's where I'd go, to see Mary as a Go-Go dancer at an EPI VU gig.....

Martine Beswick is "The Queen Of All Evil!" Martine started her career as the 'dancing silhouette during the opening credits' of "Dr. No," then she was cast as Zora, one of the gypsy fighting girls, in "From Russia With Love," then there was "Slave Girls," "One Million Years BC," "Prehistoric Women" and her role as Sister Hyde before she became the evilest woman in the world! She was Miss Jamaica in 1961!!

Troy doesn't last very long in the sack with "The Queen Of All Evil!"

I told you not to ask me about 'da plane' again!!

The third member of the unholy allianace of evil is Henry Judd Baker, as Jackal The Giant! Henry was also in four episodes of "Dark Shadows" as Istvan. It seems like Henry had a penchant for working in movies with one word titles like "Fingers," "Cruising," "Neighbors," "Vigilante," "America," and "Shakedown!"

The music for "Seizure" was composed by the mysterious Lee Gagnon, who only worked on two other films besides "Seizure," and one of them was a short! Monsieur Gagnon was a highly respected Canadian jazz saxophonist, flutist, and band leader who at times led a 10 piece jazz band, sometimes a quartet, and sometimes a quintet! He released at least five albums in the 60's and 70's!

The evil trio give what's left of the family members a headstart in a race of life or death!!

Charlie Hughes gets taken out quickly!!

Mikki was getting away, and you think she just might make it, but she ends up being forced into a gladiatorial Westside Story style knife fight with Edmund!

Don't get the idea this movie is a comedy, it's plenty weird all right, and it's funny enough, but it's also absurdly uncomfortable to watch at times!

"The Queen Of All Evil" wins all the battles, and the war of wits with Edmund Blackstone!

Edmund is left in his own personal Hell! There's nobody else to blame, he wrote the story himself!

4 comments:

prof. grewbeard said...

"bury Seizure", good one!faskinatin', i had no idea! looks like another must-see...

Scott Nesmith said...

Looks like a weird one. Does Netflix have it? Oh, by the way, Jonathan Frid may have appeared in 594 episodes of Dark Shadows, but the show actually ran for 1,225 episodes- just a nit I had to pick.

Eegah!! and Tabonga! said...

Indeed Scott, "Seizure" is available on Netflix, and you're right I should have said that Jonathan Frid was Barnabas Collins in 594 of the 1,225 Episodes!

A THEORETICALLY FICTIONAL CHARACTER said...

Damn, Jonathan looked a HELL of a lot better in this flick than he did on Dark Shadows. Too bad MY story set can't come to life. (Heh-heh-heh.)

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