SANTA'S CHRISTMAS CIRCUS - "Something Weird Video" (1966)

"Enchanting Excitement For Young And Old Alike!"

That's right kids, it's Santa"s Christmas Circus," and admission was only one dollar! No Sir, it just don't get any better than that!

There is something about the title "Santa's Christmas Circus," that makes me feel like it should really read "Santa's Psycho Christmas Circus!"

Damn! Just having Santa wasn't good enough? We get Whizzo The Clown Too?

What a great buy one, get one free deal!

You can basically do anything your little heart desires in "Santa's Christmas Circus" like ride a magic carpet! Just make sure that magic carpet isn't "The Creeping Terror" by mistake!

It was a dark and cold and snowy night!

Here's Whizzo!! 

"Who's always smiling, never sad? It's Whizzo!
Who makes the boys and girls so glad, Whizzo.
He's a merry fellow with a big red shiny nose,
Dressed in crazy mixed up clothes
From his head down to his toes." 

For the whole Whizzo story, head on over to the Kansas Historical Society's page dedicated to The Whizz himself! What a cheese!!

And if you don't think it's a "CIRCUS OF FUN," then listen to this, and you just might change your mind!

Frank Wiziarde was Whizzo on TV in Kansas from 1954 to 1987!

Wow! That's a lot of clowning around!

I think you're starting to get the idea, but don't get too curious, because this short trailer for "Santa's Christmas Circus" is all that's left! There are supposedly no complete versions of the movie in existence today!

Now if we only had a time machine like Whizzo did, we could go back in time and watch the whole thing!! 

Maybe some day!

But for now, if you want a larger dose of X-Mas madness from the past, you can find this trailer, and a whole bunch of other Christmas crap on a Something Weird Video titled:

"Retro Christmas Classics!"

Jeez, Whizzo looks like Moe in a clown outfit and a wheelchair! 

Any way you want to spell it, a Christmas Circus should be a "Festive treat for all the family!"

Personally, I would never even think about going to a circus during the holidays, because once the kids all start running around hyped up on new toys, Christmas day is usually enough of a circus right here at home!

I put these two pictures together because I was just imagining what you could do if you combined these two acts! The guys backflip blindfolded right into the pool! Aw, nevermind, they probably already do that in some Cirque du Soleil show in Vegas! Well, at least the posters are cool anyway!

PLANET OF THE APES / APJAC Productions, Twentieth Century Fox - 1968

Here's a movie that created a lot of buzz when it came out, and, we should all know by now that Taylor and two other astronauts come out of deep hibernation to find that their ship has crashed on an unknown planet. Escaping with little more than their clothes, they figure out that they have landed on a planet where men are uncivilized while apes have learned speech and technology. Taylor is captured and taken to the city of the apes after his throat is damaged and he cannot communicate with the apes.... It's a madhouse!!

Charlton Heston was a popular actor at the time, he would go on to star in THE OMEGA MAN and SOYLENT GREEN. Other actors include Roddy McDowall, Kim Hunter, Maurice Evans, James Whitmore and James Daly.

The spaceship Icarus crashes into an ocean on an unknown planet, the crew abandon the ship and head toward the shore.

I always liked this part where the crew come across these, I guess, scarecrows, as they're walking through the hills on their journey,

Then, the crew come across a band of humans looking for food, what the heck is going on here?!.. Obviously, they like corn!

Taylor and the crew find out that the dominate species are a bunch of damn dirty apes with horses, rifles and clubs to exercise their authority.

Here are the three faces of reason on the Planet Of The Apes. It's hilarious when one covers his eyes, one covers his ears and the other covers his mouth when they are confronted with information that they don't want to acknowledge.

Probably the most memorable scene for me is when the ape douses Taylor with a fire hose, calling him a freak. Then, Taylor says his famous line... It's a madhouse!!

It's decided that Taylor mate with the human girl, Nova. How intimate can you get with the lights on and a bunch of apes watching and giggling!

Taylor and Nova make their escape with the help of Cornelius and Zira, now, what will they find in the forbidden zone?

Well, anyway, Taylor finally solves the mystery... They are on Earth and man is responsible for destroying the planet in a nuclear war, game over, man!!

We're back on Wednesday with more Xmas stocking stuffers, just for you!

FRENZY - Alfred Hitchcock - "A Shocking Masterpiece" (1972)

Welcome to another X-mas Saturday Night Special in The Dungeon! Your present tonight is a wacky-ass film made by Alfred Hitchcock in 1972, and was the first Hitchcock film made in the UK since 1956! It's very cool how the poster artiste incorporated neckties into the composition!

It's called "FRENZY" my frenz, and frenzy is defined as "a period of uncontrolled excitement or wild behavior," and I must say, I think that fits it just fine!

It starts off with another victim of a serial necktie murderer, who we find out, rapes his victims before strangling them! I could be wrong, but I think that this is the only Alfred Hitchcock movie that ever had nudity in it!

This guy, Jon (The Vampire Lovers, The Horror Of Frankenstein, Breaking Glass) Finch as manic veteran heavy drinker Richard Blaney seems like a likely suspect!

Jean Marsh has a small role as a secretary to Richard Blaney's ex-wife! From "The Unearthly Stranger" to "Dr. Who," and "The Tomorrow People," Jean has done it all! Very early in her long and varied career, she was in the "Twilight Zone" Episode entitled "The Lonely!"

There's no mystery as to who the killer really is, Alfred let's that cat out of the bag at the very beginning! It's Richard Blaney's nice guy buddy, hard working Robert Rusk as played by Barry (Twisted Nerve, The Guru) Foster!

Robert Rusk's next victim is his pal Richard Blaney's Ex-wife, and that's not going to go well for Richard, who just got fired from his job, and is known to be a hot head!

I think this is interesting, the Ex-wife is played by Barbara Leigh-Hunt who was Lady Macbeth in a 1970 TV series called "Macbeth," and Barry Foster played Hamlet in a TV series by the same name in 1961!  It just shows you the quality of the talent in this crazy movie!

This is Babs, Richard Blaney's co-worker, kind of girlfriend, but not really!

Babs Milligan is played by the delightful Anna (Peeping Tom, Bunny Lake Is Missing, Tales Of The Unexpected) Massey.

Richard and Babs are on the run, and they're not very welcome in the home of Billie (The Flesh And The Fiends, Twisted Nerve, The Omen) Whitelaw! Not at all!

Hot on the case is Alec (The Witches, Gangs Of New York) McCowen as  the very hungry Chief Inspector Oxford! If I did the math right, Alec will be 92 next May! Intently watching the Chief Inspector chow down is his right hand man, Sergeant Spearman! The good Sergeant is played by Michael (Bedazzled, Man In A Suitcase, Hammerhead, A Clockwork Orange) Bates!

This is a really good movie but this is my favourite part! The Chief Inspector is devouring this breakfast of eggs, sausage, bacon and ham, because...........

.....................This is what his loving wife is serving him at home on these great willow pattern dishes!

Yeah, it's really gross!

On to the main dish, quail with grapes!

I love this shot! He's pounding the booze so he can face this Gawdawful meal, and she has no clue, and thinks the food is great!

Meanwhile, here's one way for a psycho killer to relax, because, after all, it is a tough job!

Babs meets up with Richard Rusk, and because she needs a place to stay.....

No, Babs, No, don't go in that door!

Too late, she didn't lsten!

The whole next scene is like something out of a Three Stooges episode! Richard Rusk disposes the body of Babs, but then realizes his pendant is clutched in her stiff hand and he has to go and try and get it out of the back of a truck hauling potatoes!  He's pulling on her dead body and gets a foot in the face for his trouble!" It's really pretty hilarious!

I do like this shot of  the sly but depraved killer!

An off-duty Sergeant Spearman comes to the Chief Inspector's home to give him some information and Mrs Oxford offers him up a Margarita! You just have to listen to her tell him the ingredients! Mrs Oxford was played by the glorious Vivien (Alfie, The Offence) Merchant!

After Sergeant Spearman dashes off without finishing his drink, Mrs. Oxford disposes of it for him! Vivien is absolutely hilarious, and in the truly sad, but life imitates art department, Vivien actually ended up having a severe drinking problem, and died at the early age of 53 from cirrhosis of the liver! Too bad, I would have loved to have a Margarita with her!

Just for kicks, here's a poster from a completely unrelated movie from 1945 with the same title!

Dude looks pretty frenetic all right like evil X-Mas!

"I thought "Frenzy" was a fun ride, so I'm going to go get back in line and do it again! Amazon has DVDs for about 10 bucks, if you have any real friends, it would make a perfect Joy To The World gift that I'm sure they will cherish, and if not, then just blame it on me! You can't lose!

THE FUGS - "FRENZY"