Tuesday, September 16, 2008

DESTROY ALL MONSTERS (Kaijû Sôshingeki) Japanese Title / Toho - 1968 / Music by Akira Ifukube

Herro, everbloody!.. Tonight Tabonga in Asian mode and have wild flick call... Ta Da... DESTROY ALL MONSTERS from Toho Studios and have Ishirô Honda as director and writer! Monster Man himself, Akira Ifukube, makin' the music for enjoyment and pleasure... He mixin' it in with some clever conversation from dudes and other stuff!

Some flick Mr. Ifukube do: The original GODZILLA!!!, RODAN!, THE MYSTERIANS, BATTLE IN OUTER SPACE, ATRAGON, GODZILLA vs MOTHRA, DAGORA, etc, etc!!..

So, click here to DESTROY ALL CRITTERS!!

Watchin' monsters on Monster Island. All Earth monster rounded up and put there. Kept there by gas and electronic junk. Hey, it 1999!!

When you on Moon Base, you can see UFOs or make phone call to Earth and say stupid thing that don't translate to English good!!

Space Chick looking good, but don't try to touch boob!!!

Tabonga favorite goofball...

Rare dragon monster, I think also in ATRAGON.

Earth dudes seen enough!

Time to break Space Chick dealie-ma-whopper!.. And, they do it too!!!!

Back on Earth, all monsters get loose, tear crap outta everything, and then assemble in big field near Mt, Fuji! Man... Monsters pretty smart!

Space Chick have ace in hole, send out Ghidrah, 3 Headed Monster aka Monster Zero! He tough SOB, take on everbloody and be kickin' their ass!!..

Earth have to bring in second-string monsters, big ugly spider and Minya, Son of Godzilla!!

But, it all pay off somehow, Ghidrah get pounded into ground and all Space Chick get scared when Godzilla step on 'em!!

Monday, September 15, 2008

AUTOPISIA DE UN FANTASMA (Autopsy Of A Ghost) - Raúl Lavista - "Basil Rathbone's Last Film" (1968)

Well, let's just keep that old comedy routine rolling, but tonight's feature comes back from South of the border again, with the WTF incredible "Autopsia De Un Fantasma!"

First off, now, come on, I might be a caveman, but I wasn't thawed out yesterday, and even I know you can't cut-up a ghost! Who do they think they're kidding?? Que Paso?? This must be some kind of comedy!!!
Featured here before, the man responsible for the music, uno hombre malo, Raúl Lavista!!

We're so lucky to be able to review this film, it seems like Tabonga stumbled into some godforsaken cantina in Guanajuato, Mexico and bought it under the counter for some ungodly amount, not knowing that it was like 17 generations of VHS tape recorded at the slow speed! So, you get what you get, and that is some kind of off the wall version of "Wooly Bully" with Chipmunks on speed tape loops crossed with the best of the jammin' music from Jerry Warren's "Batwoman." I know, that's like Huh? but you'll see or hear what I mean, when you listen to this, "Autopsia De Un Fantasma" or "Autopsy Of A Ghost."

And if you still don't believe me, check this out "Batwoman" again!

John Carradine still workin' it, this time as SATAN!!

Satan sticks his tail in this gal's face while she's sleeping & she gets all turned on!!

Farting Robot!

Reaction One!

ReactionTwo!!

Reaction Three!!!

This was Basil Rathbone's last film, and Yes, it's sad to say that the careers of some of the best, ended up as nothing more than Mexican farting robots! What can I say, we all gripe on a daily basis, but we get what what we deserve I guess! Chance demasiado Tequila "Reposado Zapapan" responsable aquí!! What the Heck?!

Sunday, September 14, 2008

THE COMEDY OF TERRORS / AIP - 1964 / Music by Les Baxter

"Your favorite creeps...together again!" Tag line ~

Our man, Les, is back at the musical helm tonight. This is truly a fine little classic from AIP and the gang, and, still, a million laughs! Corman did the right thing and got Jacques Tourneur to direct!

The music is on the lighter side, but, Joyce Jameson's singing is fairly terrifying in itself! Give a listen to A Comedy Of Terrors!

Here are some other movies we've already posted with music by Les Baxter: PHARAOH'S CURSE, VOODOO ISLAND, PANIC IN THE YEAR ZERO, THE TERROR, DEMENTIA 13, SPACE MONSTER, THE EYE CREATURES, GHOST IN INVISIBLE BIKIN and THE DUNWICH HORROR!! ...And, more to come!

Here's a strange little triangle! Vincent Price and Joyce Jameson are married, but, Vinnie basically dispises everything about her. In fact, Vinnie likes only one thing... Money! Peter Lorre is Vin's bumbling assistant, Felix, seen here inspecting some of his casket work! He's secretly in love with Joyce and hates Vinnie and the way he abuses her!

Then, there's Rhubarb the cat, here with Boris Karloff, drinking his milk while Boris catches a few winks! Boris is Joyce's father.

Vinnie is full of laughs in this film! He poisons Boris's milk, but, Joyce sees him do it and pours it out. Then, a citizen gets pushed down by Vin when he gives a pleasant gesture while passing him in the street!

Probably the best part of the movie is when Vinnie and Peter are out to murder the rich Mr. Phipps. Peter accidently knocks over the top statue and stand and they topple over, one by one, all the way down! Ironically, no one was awakened from their sleep!!

Later, the boys are called out to verify the death. Peter oogles Mrs. Phipps as she grieves for her dead husband! Mrs. Phipps is played by Dungeon favorite, Beverly (BRIDES OF BLOOD) Hills!

And, you see, Vinnie just has a sweet thing going on!..

Let's not forget Basil Rathbone as John F. Black, Esq., landlord and local eccentric! He's next on Vinnie's hit list.

At the funeral, Joyce belts out... "He is not dead, but, sleeping!"

Peter gets all worked up at the party after the funeral!

But, Joyce wants hubby! Look at the way Vinnie reacts... Pure disgust!! He was counting his money!!

The problem is, Basil ain't dead!! Joe E. Brown in his last role gives his famous scream as Basil has just crawled out of his coffin!!

After about the fourth time of thinking Basil was dead, but, he wasn't, Vinnie pulls out a gun and finally does him in!

There is a happy ending, though! Vinnie drinks his own poison by mistake, Peter and Joyce get together and Boris goes to bed!!!

Saturday, September 13, 2008

THE 30-FOOT BRIDE OF CANDY ROCK - Raoul Kraushaar - "Main TItle" (1959)

This isn't exactly pleasant, but sometimes you just have to do it! Copies of "The 30-Foot Bride Of Candy Rock" are pretty hard to find, but maybe that's really not such a bad thing! I don't know, it just seems like this whole movie takes it's stupidity too seriously! Forced might be a good description! You've got a fine cast with Lou Costello, Dorothy Provine, Gale Gordon etc, but this film should really probably have been a 30 minute pilot for some TV sitcom. Even the music by the brilliant Raoul Kraushaar is pretty limp, and, the theme would be befitting to a Ma & Pa Kettle episode!

SOUNDCLIP NOT AVAILABLE

Filmed in 'Wonderama' and 'Mattascope', Wow! I think maybe it was too much!!

Sadly, this would be Lou Costello's last film & the only one without Bud Abbott! Maybe it's me, maybe it's just this picture, but Lou looks a little lost and alone to me.

Here's the basic premise, Lou, as Arnie Pinsetter(and you do have to love that name)and Dorothy Provine as sweet little Emmy Lou Rossiter are going to get married. He has built this machine, and then everything goes wrong!!

Dorothy looks great no matter what size she is, but is not real happy with her boyfriend Lou after he transformed her!

Here's two way too cool guys! Joey Faye is the one on the left. Joey was one of 3 or 4 guys who staked claim to the burlesque bit "Slowly I turned, step by step" made famous by The Three Stooges, Abbott & Costello and more. Doodles Weaver on the right, worked with one our heroes, Spike Jones, and was the voice of the announcer in Spike's horse race version of the "William Tell Overture" etc, etc. Unfortunately, even talent of this caliber can't save a film like this! Doodles Weaver is actually Sigourney Weaver's uncle, can you see the resemblance?

So the Boosters help Artie get Emily set up!

Emily is in the barn taking a shower, with Artie providing the water with a firehose!!

Right about then, this gooberfied helicopter pilot, played by Jack Straw (Father of singer and actress Syd Straw) who is supposed to be guiding the troops, flies over the scene, and totally looses control when he spots Emily!!!

The really not too bad special effects were done by the wizard Jack Rabin, and the 'giant' scenes are literally head and shoulders above movies like "The Cyclops', but you still gotta wonder if Mr. B.I.G. would have made a better version of this film than this!!! Dorothy has just had about enough of this crap by this point!!!

Monster Music

Monster Music
AAARRGGHHH!!!! Ya'll Come On Back Now, Y'Hear??