Friday, January 14, 2011

TERRORVISION / Altair Productions - 1986

Hello everbloody, welcome to Friday Frights, here at The Dungeon... Here's one we used to see on the USA Network on cable back in the late eighties! Cheese might be a good term to use when talking about this flick, because, almost every aspect about it is pretty much way over the top!

It all starts here, on the planet Pluton. One of their 'bad' mutant creature's being shot into space, they do that just to get rid of the damn things! You'll hear it ricochet off some planets right before the theme starts in the soundclip!

The music is by Richard Band, brother of Exec. Producer Charles and son of Producer, Albert... It runs in the family! Here's a few other movies Richard composed for: LASERBLAST, PARASITE, GHOULIES, RE-ANIMATOR, TROLL, FROM BEYOND, PUPPETMASTER, BRIDE OF RE-ANIMATOR, SHATTERBRAIN, DRAGONWORLD, CASTLE FREAK, ROBO WARRIORS and HIDEOUS! Naturally, Richard's still working today.

Best of all though, The Terrorvision song was written and performed by those crazy menses, The Fibonaccis, and, Stan's Theme was sung by Hal Negro!

Aw'rite! Let's bring in our lil' button pusher, Ralphie The Tarantula, to push that button all the way down, which in turn begins the electrical impulse that triggers the electro wire to click against the spark-o-meter and eventually travel way across the room and then finally come to rest here... TERRORVISION!

This is the way Tabonga likes his wimmen... Exercising! Here's Dungeon favotite, Mary Woronov, as Raquel Putterman, modern housewife! Mary, with 110 acting credits, was also in these fine flicks... KISS THE BOOT, SHOWER, ****, SEIZURE, COVER GIRL MODELS, ROCK 'N' ROLL HIGH SCHOOL, EATING RAOUL, ANGEL OF H.E.A.T., BLOOD THEATRE, HELLHOLE, CHOPPING MALL, BLACK WIDOW, BUSTER'S BEDROOM, MOTORAMA, ZOO and FROG-G-G!

Bert Remsen plays nutty war veteran, grandpa Putterman. Bert had 186 acting credits, appearing mostly on TV, a few shows were THE WEB, MAN WITH A CAMERA, YANCY DERRINGER, JOHNNY STUCCATO, THRILLER, PETER GUNN, MY THREE SONS, LEAVE IT TO BEAVER, THE OUTER LIMITS, THE THIRD MAN, THE ANDY GRIFFITH SHOW, THE ROOKIES, CHARLIE'S ANGELS, THE NEW ADVENTURES OF WONDER WOMAN and more!

Gerrit Graham plays Stanley Putterman, he just got his new satellite dish installed and the whole family's checking it out! Gerrit was also in BEWARE! THE BLOB, PHANTOM OF THE PARADISE, TUNNEL VISION, DEMON SEED, THE ANNIHILATORS, RATBOY, MARTIANS GO HOME and CHILD'S PLAY 2.

Here's Jon Gries as O.D., boyfriend of teenage daughter, Suzy Putterman...

Raquel likes him a lot, but, Stanley's not so sure..


Grandpa and grandson Sherman scan through some of the new channels they can now get on their satellite dish. That's Medusa hosting her horror movie show, played by the boobalicious, Jennifer Richards.

Grandpa thought he heard something... The mutant creature has actually used the satellite dish as a conduit to manifest itself inside the Putterman home!

Guests are invited to swing with the Puttermans. That's Alejandro Rey as Spiro and Randi Brooks as Cherry. Check out Stanley!

Sherman wanders in just at the wrong time, so, mom forces him into their underground bunker and locks him in! He's trying to tell her that there's a monster in the house!

Then, she finds out that Spiro is actually interested in Stanley!!

Spiro decides to go for a dip in the pool with Cherry after Stanley turns him down.

This is O.D.'s custom painted Mustang!

Sherman, Suzy and O.D. go looking for the parents...

And, here's what they find!

Later, they find out that the ugly critter is just hungry, so, they feed it and make friends for awhile.

Medusa makes the 'party' just in time to watch the dude chasing the mutant creature's head explode inside his glass helmut!

So, now, the thing has no way of being stopped!!

Medusa gets the last word... Ghoulnight Everbloody!!

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

STARSHIP INVASIONS - Gil Mellé - "Proceed With The Attack" (1977)

Talk about your wacky!! "Starship Invasions" is about as wild as anything I've seen lately, and it's all once again, courtesy of the man with the best, worst taste around, hows about a 21 Death-Ray salute for Professor Grewbeard??

The fine gentleman who composed the music for "Starship Invasions" was Blue Note jazz musician, film composer, and artist, Gilbert John Mellé, who, in reality, is much bigger than this movie! He played the baritone and tenor sax with his own group, and also with such greats as Zoot Sims, Max Roach and Tal Farlow. As an artist, he designed the covers for record albums by Miles Davis, Thelonius Monk, and Sonny Rollins. He was an early pioneer of electronic music, to which he scored Rod Serling's TV chiller classic "Night Gallery," and he also wrote the scores for "The Andromeda Strain," "The Six Million Dollar Man" and "The Night Stalker," just to mention a few! Gil passed away in 2004, but what a legacy he left behind!

"Starship Invasions" had a budget and a vision, but "Star Wars" had just been released like 5 months earlier, and this thing although very fun to watch, is just pretty silly by comparison. The bar had been raised, and the playing field was anything but level!

Just for starters, they should have fired the pinhead costume designer!

This lucky stiff got to have sex with a good lookin' alien, and they didn't even dissect him or anything!

Normally a guy that can save any movie, Christopher Lee as Captain Rameses just looks as silly as the rest of them! Chris is 6'5" and with that stupid looking hat on, he had to be pushing 7 feet!! Part of the problem is these aliens are telepathic, so the normally eloquent Chris Lee, can only think his lines! What a waste!!

These aliens are so wicked, they even zapped a little boy and his family!

Now her they want to run some more tests on! That makes sense!

I just like this photo, it's pretty neat that they got a picture of the flying saucer with their Polaroid!

You know the story, Chris Lee and his Legion Of The Winged Serpent Brigade(The Men In Black)need to take over Earth because they need a new planet to move their dying civilization to! The twist is there's another laid back and tolerant alien group, called the League Of Races also known as the LOR, living here beneath the waters of The Bermuda Triangle, and their job is to protect the lesser intelligent earthlings!

Captain Rameses and his team come to the underwater base and tell his LOR counterpart that they come in peace!

Captain Rameses is impressed, the LOR are no slackers, they've got hookers to keep them entertained in this lonesome outpost!

They are starting to get the vibe that Captain Rameses and his crew are up to no good, but that's a pretty cool background!!

No more subtleties, now it's time to break out the death rays and take over this joint! In the process, they even fry the robots!!

Oh, No, don't kill the hookers, that's way over the top evil!

Captain Rameses has a little one on one battle with who I think is Sherri Ross as Sagnac! As you would suspect, she loses!!

The Legion Of The Winged Serpent takes complete control of The League Of Races stronghold, and sets this saucer orbiting around earth emitting rays that makes humans kill each other and also commit suicide! Mass carnage breaks out on Earth!

Actually, you can pretty much tell the whole story with just these three magazine covers!!! Renowned UFOlogist Professor Allan Duncan played by "The Man From U.N.C.L.E." Robert Vaughn is brought in to save the world, because he's the only one who knows anything about UFOs! Robert Vaughn will always be my hero, just for being the member of "The Magnificent Seven" who lost his courage!!

One LOR ship escaped, and they too ask for the professor's help, but he wants to bring along his buddy, to help him in case there's any math involved!

One of the LOR's robots wasn't completely destroyed, and comes back to life, and messes up the whole plan, just like that!!!

Two years later, writer and director Ed Hunt, would make a documentary movie entitled "Flying Saucers Are Real!" Imagine that!!

Monster Music

Monster Music
AAARRGGHHH!!!! Ya'll Come On Back Now, Y'Hear??