YÔKAI HYAKU MONOGATARI - Michiaki Watanabe - "100 Monsters" (1968)

What could be more prefect on this post Easter, or as also referred to by some, pre Rondo night, than one of the best films I've seen lately, the 1968 classic, and first in the series of three, "Yôkai Hyaku Monogatari," or "Yokai Monsters - 100 Monsters"! The music was composed by one of the masters, Michiaki Watanabe, or the name he used on this film, Chemei Watanabe. You should recognize Mr. Watanabe's name by now, as he composed the soundtracks for "Invasion Of The Neptune Men," "Attack From Space," "Space Rulers" and "Evil Brain From Outer Space," just to name a few!

So where do you start with a movie like this, there's only one place, and that's at the beginning, I guess!

If this opening sequence doesn't get your attention, and pique your interest, then you might want to check your pulse rate!

The "Yokai Monsters" have deep roots in traditional Japanese folklore, but the line of logic is not difficult to follow!

The sub-titles make my job easy, as they readily explain a lot of what's happening!! Yes, that's right, the opening sequence was only just a story!!

So, let's get on with the story; as I was saying, it can be kind of self-explanatory!!!

Okay, this dude is warning these guys straight-out-point-blank that if they continue to do what they are doing, something very bad is going to happen!

But as you can see, these gay blades are probably not the sharpest knives in the drawer, and I sure as Hell wouldn't want one of them doing brain surgery on me with one of those dull machetes!!

So they catch an ugly fish and take it home, and the one guy tells his wife to cook it for him and his buddy while they hang out and drink some sake!! Ugh, kinda chewy!! "It's good. Have some!" Sure, right!!!

So just exactly what part of the "Horrifying Curse" were they too ignorant to understand?

Sure, that's exactly what happened, Lightning! Right!! You might want to have a talk with that one guy's widow, you know the one with the Mrs. Fantastic neck!!

When you hear the goofy music start up, you'll know that's when the Umbrella Monster comes into the scene. The Umbrella Monster or Kasa Obake, is a Japanese Spirit that becomes animated when it reaches it's 100 birthday, so be careful hanging onto that stuff for too long!

More self-explantory dialogue!!!

There is another story going on as well. Despite a lot of opposition, these evil businessmen bastards destroy the peoples digs, because they want to build a whorehouse!! Well, you can only guess what they've got coming to them!!!

What's that, indeed? Evil is what evil does, and it's coming around again!

You can run, but you can't hide when the creature with no eyes sees where you are going!

Yeah, I wonder what happened too?? Gee, suddenly it really is awfully quiet!

You saw a monster? You must be kidding, why would something like that be happening?

The super gigantic green screen witch scares the eggs right out of these evildoers!!

A lot of the Yokai Monsters appear to be like Yokai Muppets, but even though I've seen big monster muppets eat smaller muppets, I've never seen them kill any humans!!

Yep, you got that right, this is my new wallpaper!!

They got the whole Yokai gang riled up now; they're going for the jugular and yes, this one spectre can even spit fire!!

The Yokai's have got the stupid evil dirty rotten lousy boss right where they want him now, and that's all she wrote!! Story over!!

Yokai Monsters are fun, scary and unpredictable as all get out, so stick with the basics, just pay attention when you are warned, and don't piss them off!

SISTERS OF DEATH / De Ville Films - 1977

This movie was shot in 1972 by De Ville Films and released in 1977, and is the only production by them. Considered a decent film by most critics, has a good cast including Arthur Franz, Claudia Jennings and Joe E. Tata.

It's all about an accidental death at a sorority initiation, ruled an accident, but, is somebloody guilty of moidur?! Look at that very cool Turkish(?) poster!! ...Hey, izzat a Gatling gun?!

Now, that Tabonga kind of gurlz!!

Tabonga have no idea who make the excellent music in our soundclip, sound kinda Hammerish at beginning, then The Tijuana Brass bring the wine, then some cool screams rounding it all off!!

On wif' da lineup, as they say down at the old 13th precinct!.. Ralphie the Tarantula has honors to push big red 'GO' button to send today 'Eariffic Earclip' on merry way for everbloody enjoyment!.. So, hits it, Ralphie, time to pay visit to those!.. SISTERS OF DEATH!!

Seven years after the death, all 'Sisters' are invited to attend a reunion, with a $500 bump to make sure they'll show up!

Music?..

Sorry, me no speak English!

Filmed in place very familiar to Eegah!! an' Tabonga! Intersection of Hwy 46 and Hwy 1, a thousand places to go from there, up and down the old California coast!

Gurlz get picked up by two hired beach bums in their classy Jeep Wagoneer, with a towel for a window!

Classic 'weird lookin' place!' One reason this flick suffers is because no place really look scary at high noon!

Arthur like playing peeping phantom!

Arthur is brother of gurl that get killed, so now he filled with rage and he want sweet revenge...

He have two hobby, making bullets...

And, playing flute to record!.. Wow, he is one 'deep' maniac!

Another great seventies fashion statement!!

Oh, did Tabonga mention that nobloody can leave because of electrified fence! All they have to do is dig hole under fence and escape, what morons!

He not just crazy, he totally nutz!! Does anybloody hear a coo-coo clock beside Tabonga?

Finally, time to bring out Gatling gun, YAY!!

Even though Arthur get his in the end, there is twist ending to leave viewer with!..

ERCOLE AL CENTRO DELLA TERRA - Armando Trovajoli - "Hercules In The Haunted World" (1961)

Mario Bava was a very colourful guy, and his career was really starting to roll when he took on "Ercole Al Centro Della Terra," a film of Herculean proportions back in 1961!

Also billed as the more literal "Hercules At The Center Of The Earth," this film has some colourful characters like Reg Park as Hercules (Ercole), a bodybuilder of some noteriety, having been beat out by none other than Steve Reeves in 1950 for the Mr. Universe title, Reg came back and took the title outright in 1951, 1958, and 1965. The man knew how to work!! We're talkin' Mr. Universe here! Damn! They also say that Reg Park was Arnie's soul and inspiration!!

Also known as "Hercules And The Haunted World," this is one amazingly colourful movie!! And why is that? Mario Bava also did his own cinematography, and there is no way to reiterate how important that is to the look of this awesome flick! Look, you can actually have sunrise and sunset all in the same shot and get away with it if you're Mario Bava!

Pageboy haircuts just never seem to go out of style, although that's not my favorite look on Christopher Lee!! Just in case you haven't checked lately, Chris Lee has been in at least 264 films with 3 still set for release probably this year!! What the Hell would we ever have done without him??

Here's one small example of why you don't mess with the cat named King Lico in this film, sure go help yourself, next thing you know, it's pincushion city!!

I love this shot for two reasons, the tongue hanging out of the wall sculpture, and the smirking smile on King Lico's face!!

The amazing and spectacular lighting makes the whole scene look like one giant Maxfield Parrish painting!! The atmospheric music is by Armando Trovajoli, a masestro with over 211 composing credits, who left his mark on many a Hercules and Toto film!!

Not quite the musclehead version of Larry, Moe and Curly, but getting kinda close, maybe more like Manny, Moe, and Jack! Every hero guy needs some buddies!!

AAARRRAAGHH!!! Big scary rock monster, the likes of which haven't been seen since "Missile To The Moon!" Now if only "Missile To The Moon" had been made in colour(nod nod, wink wink), that would be a sight to see!!

Franco Giacobini as Telemachus, gets the job on this outing as the guy in charge of the comedy relief, and is not nearly as obnoxious as this type of sniveling character can sometimes be!

Well, it's getting pretty obvious we are getting closer to the bowels of Hell!!

So finally, here we are in Hell, and what a sight to see, looks like a great place to have the next big Black Sabbath concert!! The psychedelics are built right into the landscape!! Pretty far-out for 1961!!

Herc and his best pal Thesus, played by George Ardisson, need to get across the great abyss, so in my favorite shot, Hercules tosses a boulder with a root tied onto it over to the other side!

Cinch it down good, and now you've got a great opportunity to show off some of Reg's big muscles!!

Oh, Great, wussy boy Thesus loses his grip and drops down into the fiery depths of Hades!!

Oh, but look, there is justice in Hell, as Thesus is saved from a horrible death by a lovely stranger!!

As it turns out, King Lico is in cahoots with The Devil, and this whole excursion was just an elaborate scheme so he could hit on Herc's girlfriend, Princess Deianira, played by sword and sandal diety Leonora Ruffo!

Oh, Yeah, that lovely stranger also happened to be none other than Ida Galli as Persephone, Satan's daughter, and the big man from below is not really happy about her hobnobbin' with Goblins, and especially not with mere mortals, so as you probably already figured out............

Now, it's time for all Hell to really break loose, and Herc has to kick a whole lot of dead ass in the end, and of course, as you would expect, he does a mighty fine job of it!