ERCOLE AL CENTRO DELLA TERRA - Armando Trovajoli - "Hercules In The Haunted World" (1961)

Mario Bava was a very colourful guy, and his career was really starting to roll when he took on "Ercole Al Centro Della Terra," a film of Herculean proportions back in 1961!

Also billed as the more literal "Hercules At The Center Of The Earth," this film has some colourful characters like Reg Park as Hercules (Ercole), a bodybuilder of some noteriety, having been beat out by none other than Steve Reeves in 1950 for the Mr. Universe title, Reg came back and took the title outright in 1951, 1958, and 1965. The man knew how to work!! We're talkin' Mr. Universe here! Damn! They also say that Reg Park was Arnie's soul and inspiration!!

Also known as "Hercules And The Haunted World," this is one amazingly colourful movie!! And why is that? Mario Bava also did his own cinematography, and there is no way to reiterate how important that is to the look of this awesome flick! Look, you can actually have sunrise and sunset all in the same shot and get away with it if you're Mario Bava!

Pageboy haircuts just never seem to go out of style, although that's not my favorite look on Christopher Lee!! Just in case you haven't checked lately, Chris Lee has been in at least 264 films with 3 still set for release probably this year!! What the Hell would we ever have done without him??

Here's one small example of why you don't mess with the cat named King Lico in this film, sure go help yourself, next thing you know, it's pincushion city!!

I love this shot for two reasons, the tongue hanging out of the wall sculpture, and the smirking smile on King Lico's face!!

The amazing and spectacular lighting makes the whole scene look like one giant Maxfield Parrish painting!! The atmospheric music is by Armando Trovajoli, a masestro with over 211 composing credits, who left his mark on many a Hercules and Toto film!!

Not quite the musclehead version of Larry, Moe and Curly, but getting kinda close, maybe more like Manny, Moe, and Jack! Every hero guy needs some buddies!!

AAARRRAAGHH!!! Big scary rock monster, the likes of which haven't been seen since "Missile To The Moon!" Now if only "Missile To The Moon" had been made in colour(nod nod, wink wink), that would be a sight to see!!

Franco Giacobini as Telemachus, gets the job on this outing as the guy in charge of the comedy relief, and is not nearly as obnoxious as this type of sniveling character can sometimes be!

Well, it's getting pretty obvious we are getting closer to the bowels of Hell!!

So finally, here we are in Hell, and what a sight to see, looks like a great place to have the next big Black Sabbath concert!! The psychedelics are built right into the landscape!! Pretty far-out for 1961!!

Herc and his best pal Thesus, played by George Ardisson, need to get across the great abyss, so in my favorite shot, Hercules tosses a boulder with a root tied onto it over to the other side!

Cinch it down good, and now you've got a great opportunity to show off some of Reg's big muscles!!

Oh, Great, wussy boy Thesus loses his grip and drops down into the fiery depths of Hades!!

Oh, but look, there is justice in Hell, as Thesus is saved from a horrible death by a lovely stranger!!

As it turns out, King Lico is in cahoots with The Devil, and this whole excursion was just an elaborate scheme so he could hit on Herc's girlfriend, Princess Deianira, played by sword and sandal diety Leonora Ruffo!

Oh, Yeah, that lovely stranger also happened to be none other than Ida Galli as Persephone, Satan's daughter, and the big man from below is not really happy about her hobnobbin' with Goblins, and especially not with mere mortals, so as you probably already figured out............

Now, it's time for all Hell to really break loose, and Herc has to kick a whole lot of dead ass in the end, and of course, as you would expect, he does a mighty fine job of it!

THE HUMAN MONSTER / Monogram Pictures - 1940

Also known as THE DARK EYES OF LONDON, this story by Edgar (KING KONG) Wallace is exceptional, especially as far as maniacal villains go! Also considered one of Bela's best acting jobs, he plays a dual role as Dr. Feodor Orloff, a murdering, lecherous insurance salesman, and then the kindly leader of a home for the blind, Prof. John Dearborn. Bela filmed this one in England, with British writers and director, helping make it a minor classic that still has the ability to creep you out, even today!! Great poster, too!

Welcome everbloody, to another Wednesday Oldie Moldie B+W Bijou Flicktime Theater posting, here at the Dungeon, with big wood monster dude host ~ Tabonga!

Original music is by Irish Guy Jones, who has a total of 11 composing credits including the other British productions LITTLE DOLLY DAYDREAM, LITTLE MISS MOLLY, CHAMBER OF HORRORS, THE FARMER'S WIFE, THE PATIENT VANISHES and SUSPECTED PERSON!

Okay, Tabonga pet gnat, Piff, say shaddup and get el showo rolloing alongo... So, wonst again, Piff getting long flying start from across the buttress, toward big red 'GO' button... Closer... Ever closer... An' closer yet!.. Finally, almost... Then... BAM-CRASH-POW-BOOM!! Here's tudae's Eariffic Earclip... THE HUMAN MONSTER!!

You'd better know the club password, or big blind Jake might just strangle your ass... err, throat! Jake, played by Wilfred Walter, was appearing on Brit TV way back in 19 freakin' 38!!!

Here is Bela as Professor Dearborn, recipient of insurance claims made in his behalf, cleverly crafted by his alter ego and person, insurance blackmailer and salesman, Dr. Orloff... Simple, no?!

Victims, the insurance clients of Dr. Orloff, are showing up dead, so the police are a little suspicious of him and his motives.

People that know things keep on dieing, Orloff knows where they live!.. And, bathe!!! Good thing Jake's blind, this time he has to 'deep six' some old fart inna bathtub!.. Who's nakkid!!..

Greta Gynt plays Diana, her dad's there, she gets a job as a helper at the home. Jake creeps her out!

That's some fashion statement she's got on there!

Diana finds a clue to the mysteries and confronts the 'blind' Professor Dearborn.

He rips his disguise off... And, guess what?

Whoa, time out for the gratuitous bondage scene!

Ready for this??.. Right in front of her, he throws her handicapped father into the river from the 6th story!!

Jake can't 'feel' Diana's father, who he faithfully cares for. He goes bonkers and attacks Bela.

Even though Jake is shot and left for dead, he recovers enough to deal the final blow!! Master defeated by his monster, once again!

At the end, Jake throws Bela into the deadly slag pond. How fitting, slime begat slime!!

WE LOVE EDGAR WALLACE!!!..

SPACE PATROL #02 - Lew Spence - "The Race For Radurium" (1951)

So try this one on, it's 1951, World War II just got over, and your neighbor was one of them lucky families that got a TV, so you go over to spend the night with your best pal, and "Space Patrol" comes on the toob, and it's one of the most far-out futuristic, scientific things you have ever seen in your short life, and so you sit there in awe and rapture for 30 minutes as you're transported to a future you've never even dreamed of! Tonight's feature is the second of some some 157 episodes, entitled the extra super scary "The Race for Radurium" where Cadet Happy gets afflicted by a mega dangerous cosmic ray!!

Ed Kemmer as Commander Buzz Corry and Lyn Osborn as Cadet Happy are here to take you on at least 4 years of adventures!! It's no big secret how Happy got his name!!

Oh, Man, Cadet Happy touched that wire and got burned by the mighty cosmic ray, a mysterious concept covered on many levels before, and he ain't lookin' too happy right here!!

Besides being Tonga for 154 episodes of "Space Patrol," Nina Bara has the distinct honour of starting her career in "The Mummy's Curse" and ending it in "Missile To The Moon!" In The Dungeon, it doesn't get much better than that!!

We're talkin' speaker phone 1951, not just some hole cut in a cardboard box!! Don't matter, Tonga's lookin' good, and I can't quite figger out why her and Tabonga never got together!

Side story line includes bad guy Crane Whitley as the mad fugitive Kessler (but not a bad whiskey!) Crane Whitley had a career that went back all the way to 1938 and included titles like "The Invisible Man Returns" and "Spy Smasher!"

Time to put that Kessler on the rocks!!! Dude was out of control!!

Tonga's got that Radurium Glove all ready to go just in time to save Happy's life!

Dirty Ratzafratz!! Lyn Osborn left this planet way too soon, but in the short amount of time that he was here, he managed to get in all 157 episodes of "Space Patrol" and roles in the classics, "Invasion Of The Saucer Men," "The Amazing Colossal Man," and "The Cosmic Man!"

Lew Spence was the fellow working in the Music Department, but there really wasn't a whole lot of music going on, more just rocketship white noise that I'm sure fans of Lou Reed's "Metal Machine Music," and the space in between the cuts on any Mile Davis LP will enjoy! Oh, Yeah, some things don't change, "Buy Bonds!" or the whole dream's going in the crapper!

There's only like 6 people in any given story, but as a lad, it never dawned on me that the rest of civilization as we know it had been most likely DEE-stroyed, and I wouldn't even be here today to write this! Here Kessler gets the jump on Happy!

There's no way we're going to attempt to tackle all 157 episodes of "Space Patrol" here, but there will be a few more in the future for your enjoyment, but besides this, there's also the UK marionette version, and we've still got to go back and cover the German version, "Raumpatrouille" in proper style, with better sound and pictures, and none of it would be possible without some generous donations from Professor Grewbeard, thank-you very much, that cat just rocks!!

At the end of this adventurous tale, Happy turns the tables, and gets the jump on Dopey Kessler using the Radurium Glove to his complete advantage, by conking Kessler on the noggin for the amazing tie-in of the two stories!