Wednesday, November 23, 2016

THE BEASTIES - THANKSKILLING 3 - Special Holiday Double Feature!!

So......On this pre-evening of thanx, I've got a special Twofer for you, or for you hipper cats, it's a one time spectacular BOGO!
That's right, two for the price of one, so step up and indulge, cause these prices can't last forever!

The opening act is a fairly recent production having escaped from the looney bin in 2012!
I just have one question, with all the homeless and hungry people in the world, how in the gobble, gobble is there money to waste on turkey doo-doo like this??

It's obvious that the Producers of "Thankskilling 3" had some money! It's just the guy who decided what it was spent on who needed to have his head examined!

"Thankskilling 3" is 99 minutes long, and I'm sure it's somebody's favorite movie, but that somebody is just not me!
I barely made it through 8 1/2 minutes!
If you've got an Amazon Prime account, this turkey streams for free, but sometimes Free just ain't good enuf!!

 Now it's time for the main event! In the red corner fighting out of Fresno, California in 1991, it's a horribly delightful film, but yet a turkey, no doubt, called "BEASTIES!"

 "BEASTIES" obviously didn't have near the budget of "Thankskilling 3," but they made much better use of the cash that they managed to scrape together!

 In some kind of weird subliminal way, I think "Beasties," as bad as it might be, is the movie we really wanted to make when we made "The Creep!"
 Rubber monsters and rock music, two elements that go together like ham and cheese! 

 The name of the Goth band in the club, (an element I always wanted, but never got in our film) is "The Shroudettes," and they manage to keep on playing no matter how ridiculous the dialogue in the club is!

"The Shroudettes" morphed into a more popular band, after working their butts off for years, and shortening their name to "The Shroud!

 "The Shroudettes" look like a band that should have been featured on my cassette culture blog that I have totally ignored for the past few months! (But now that I'm re-settled, I'm going to get back on it, because believe it or not, there is still so much great music out there that so few have heard!)

So here's about a minute of so of "The Shroudettes" minus a lot of the absurd dialogue!

They didn't have Facebook back in 1991, so if you wanted to know about "The Shroudettes," or "The Shroud" you had to go out and get scorched like these gals!

I give Steven Paul Contreras a lot of credit for this film, and not just because he wrote, directed, and produced it, but for a one time effort, "BEASTIES" is every bit as bad as 90% of the stuff out there, or better!

"BEASTIES" is special and will one day get what it deserves!
What that is, is yet to be determined!

"BEASTIES" is without a doubt, a solid turkey of a film, but it's not really a bad movie, it's just that it's way too damn long at 83 minutes. That's a lot of filler, and one thing we did avoid with "The Creep," by keeping it right at about one hour!
The fact that the special edition DVD includes an extra 20 minutes of footage is more horrifying that anything else!
Give thanks for what you have!

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