Wednesday, August 26, 2015

LES FEMMES S'EN BALANCENT - Lemmy Caution - "Dames Don't Care" (Dames Get Along) (1954)

DAMES! I don't know anymore, is that a politically correct term or not? Lemmy Caution didn't care, and it worked for him, so I guess I don't care either!

Welcome to another Weird Ass Wednesday installment of life in The Dungeon!
I don't know! From what I saw, Dames do care, and they don't get along, so what's this movie really about? The answer is Mr. F.B.I. agent Lemmy Caution!

Eddie Constantine is Lemmy Caution! I'm not exactly sure who was weirder, Eddie or Lemmy! Eddie was originally a singer, but turned to acting when that wasn't working out so well! He's got a really nice voice, and at one point in this film, he croons a couple of verses just to bide the time! He's rude, arrogant, and drinks like a fish, but, he also always gets the job done! For my money, Lemmy Caution is THE strangest secret agent spy guy in the history of movie making!!

Lemmy shows up drunk at this bar, and calls the dancing fellow a gigolo, which doesn't bode so well, and the first fist fight of many ensues!

As it turns out, the guy he was fighting was another F.B.I. agent! The fake fight was just a ruse so they could get together and talk after all was forgiven! Why they didn't just meet somewhere not so public is anyone's guess! It makes for a more interesting story this way!
The other agent is named Sagers and is played by Gil (The Respectful Whore) Delamare!

1954 or 2015, it doesn't matter! If you take a counterfeit thousand dollar bill to the bank to get change, chances are you're asking for trouble!!

Check out the quality of the skull and crossbones on this guard shack sign! No CGI needed here, that's for sure!

Lemmy's got quite the eye for the ladies, I mean dames! This particular one is
Nadia (The Spider And The Fly) Gray as the lovely newly widowed but not too despondent Henrietta Aymes!

Lemmy Caution! What a weirdo! They need to put some barricade tape around that guy!

How's that for a strategically placed palm frond? After all, this was 1954!

Henrietta explains why she's not really bothered by her husband's death!

Lemmy goes anywhere he wants to and gets an eyeful whenever he wants to!

Pretty cool pad! The designs on the wall look like a collage of police chalk mark lines!

From the looks of this sign, you wouldn't think so, but Ragheria is a swingin' little hot spot!

I rest my case!
 Remember, this is like two thirty in the afternoon on a Tuesday!

 Wow! I guess they didn't have enough money to get a decent paint job for Lemmy's car! If it were in color, I'm sure you'd agree Larry, that the official name for that color is gunk!

Lemmy is bound and held hostage for a little while! Let it be known, that when Lemmy escapes from this scene, he slaps the fat lady on the ass! As a matter of fact he does that to a couple of the dames in this film! PC be damned! I only call her the fat gal, because that's the same thing Lemmy calls her!

 The other main dame in this flick is the dazzling Dominique (The Trap Snaps Shut At Midnight) Wilms as Paulette Burdell! Notice how Lemmy is staring her right in the eyes!

Paulette's pad is also quite stylish!

A happy ending in a Lemmy Caution film? You've got to be kidding, but then if you've ever read this blog before, you know I don't kid around!!
If it just so happens that you want to check out Lemmy for yourself, then Sinister Cinema is the place you wanna be, Yessiree! 


Grant said...

I've never seen a Lemmy Caution film except ALPHAVILLE once, and I know that's considered kind of an "anomalous" one. The impression I get from this one, along with that fake fight scene, makes me think of the "KOMMISSAR X" movies. I forget whether you've reviewed any of those or not.

Eegah!! said...

Yeah, I know we did at least one "Kommissar X film a few years back!

Still raw, but "Kiss Kiss Kill Kill" was pretty sophisticated compared to this Lemmy Caution endeavor!

Anonymous said...

Jered Harris plays Solo's CIA superior in the new Man From UNCLE movie. With his craggy face and gray fedora, he resembles Eddie Constantine as Lemmy Caution or Nick Carter. I don't know if the resemblance is intentional or coincidental, though.

Eegah!! said...


TC said...

I don't know if the CIA guy's resemblance to Eddie Constantine is intended or not, but the U.N.C.L.E. movie does seem to have homages and allusions to past spy-fi movies. Solo's background is similar to Harry Palmer, the agent played by Michael Caine in "The Ipcress File" and "Funeral in Berlin." And one of the bad guys is named "Count Lippy," which was also the name (with a slightly different spelling) of a minor villain in "Thunderball."

R. Claude said...

When we were young, we meet each saturday* to watch a movie with Lemmy Caution/Eddie Constantine. Boys and girls were all dressed in 50's style. We played jazz and lounge music. After the movie, we were dancing, drinking good wine and eating good sandwiches. It was a good time ! (On my blog, a put a link to the DVD's trailer of "Hoppla, jetzt kommt Eddie !", the first Eddie Caution's adventure in german.)

* In 1979/80.

Eegah!! said...

Great comment René! Merci!! (Anybody that wants to see some cool pix, go check out René's blog!!)

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