THE WICKER MAN / British Lion Film Corporation - 1973
This week I'll be doing two movies that Lord Litter loves to watch over and over, I'll start with this super special movie. Our pal Greg Goodsell clued me in a year ago, so, here we go!!.. Our story's about a police sergeant that's sent to a Scottish island village in search of a missing girl whom the townsfolk claim never existed. But, even stranger are the religious rites that take place there. For those who want to know, the 2006 version with Nicolas Cage is a giant pile of crap, so, don't waste your time with it.
I have a sound clip for your approval, sooooo, you can push the big red 'GO' button located there by our atomic toaster, NOW, Ralphie The Tarantula!.. Here's a sample from... THE WICKER MAN!
Sgt. Howie (Edward Woodward) shows up in Summerisle to investigate the disappearance of the young girl.
But, he feels like everyone's shining him on. Here, the locals sing about bedding women!
The locations are beautiful and plush, in the Nicolas Cage version the countryside is all dried out and just plain ugly!
Sgt. Howie pays a visit to Lord Summerisle, a Chris Lee role that will amaze. He wants to know why there are girls dancing nude on the grounds, a bit of that conversation is heard in the sound clip.
The sarge decides to leave in his plane to make a negative report about his findings, but, it won't start and he's stranded without communication to headquarters, not good!
Then, he finds these horny dolls on his bed, soooo...
It's time for a big stiff one!!
Things get extra strange when the island festival gears up, masks and costumes for everyone!
Sgt. Howie finds the missing girl and presents her to the crowd. She quickly runs away from him and gladly joins the rest of her people... WTF?!!
The sarge is cleaned up and dressed in a white gown, then dragged away toward...
A giant freaking wicker man!! Holy Hell, what is that damn thing anyway?!..
It's very bad news for Sgt. Howie, bringing an end to this fascinating flick, comes with our highest recommendation!! Now, all we have to do is wonder what Eegah!! will have for us on Wednesday.