LES FEMMES S'EN BALANCENT - Lemmy Caution - "Dames Don't Care" (Dames Get Along) (1954)

DAMES! I don't know anymore, is that a politically correct term or not? Lemmy Caution didn't care, and it worked for him, so I guess I don't care either!

Welcome to another Weird Ass Wednesday installment of life in The Dungeon!

I don't know! From what I saw, Dames do care, and they don't get along, so what's this movie really about? The answer is Mr. F.B.I. agent Lemmy Caution!

Eddie Constantine is Lemmy Caution! I'm not exactly sure who was weirder, Eddie or Lemmy! Eddie was originally a singer, but turned to acting when that wasn't working out so well! He's got a really nice voice, and at one point in this film, he croons a couple of verses just to bide the time! He's rude, arrogant, and drinks like a fish, but, he also always gets the job done! For my money, Lemmy Caution is THE strangest secret agent spy guy in the history of movie making!!

Lemmy shows up drunk at this bar, and calls the dancing fellow a gigolo, which doesn't bode so well, and the first fist fight of many ensues!

As it turns out, the guy he was fighting was another F.B.I. agent! The fake fight was just a ruse so they could get together and talk after all was forgiven! Why they didn't just meet somewhere not so public is anyone's guess! It makes for a more interesting story this way!

The other agent is named Sagers and is played by Gil (The Respectful Whore) Delamare!

1954 or 2015, it doesn't matter! If you take a counterfeit thousand dollar bill to the bank to get change, chances are you're asking for trouble!!

Check out the quality of the skull and crossbones on this guard shack sign! No CGI needed here, that's for sure!

Lemmy's got quite the eye for the ladies, I mean dames! This particular one is

Nadia (The Spider And The Fly) Gray as the lovely newly widowed but not too despondent Henrietta Aymes!

Lemmy Caution! What a weirdo! They need to put some barricade tape around that guy!

How's that for a strategically placed palm frond? After all, this was 1954!

Henrietta explains why she's not really bothered by her husband's death!

Lemmy goes anywhere he wants to and gets an eyeful whenever he wants to!

Pretty cool pad! The designs on the wall look like a collage of police chalk mark lines!

 

From the looks of this sign, you wouldn't think so, but Ragheria is a swingin' little hot spot!

 

I rest my case!

 Remember, this is like two thirty in the afternoon on a Tuesday!

 Wow! I guess they didn't have enough money to get a decent paint job for Lemmy's car! If it were in color, I'm sure you'd agree Larry, that the official name for that color is gunk!

Lemmy is bound and held hostage for a little while! Let it be known, that when Lemmy escapes from this scene, he slaps the fat lady on the ass! As a matter of fact he does that to a couple of the dames in this film! PC be damned! I only call her the fat gal, because that's the same thing Lemmy calls her!

 The other main dame in this flick is the dazzling Dominique (The Trap Snaps Shut At Midnight) Wilms as Paulette Burdell! Notice how Lemmy is staring her right in the eyes!

Paulette's pad is also quite stylish!

A happy ending in a Lemmy Caution film? You've got to be kidding, but then if you've ever read this blog before, you know I don't kid around!!
If it just so happens that you want to check out Lemmy for yourself, then Sinister Cinema is the place you wanna be, Yessiree! 

BLUE DEMON Contra LAS DIABOLICAS / Cinematográfica RA, Estudios América - 1968

Well, seems like a good time for a Dungeon Redo from 2008, here's a movie starring Blue Demon against some Diabolical Women in a story that takes place in Mexico. This time our hero is framed for murder and has to fight things out in the ring and in the streets...

I have a musical sound clip for your approval, sooooo, you can push the big red 'GO' button located there by our little purple demon, NOW, Ralphie The Tarantula!.. Here's a sample from... BLUE DEMON Contra LAS DIABOLICAS!

Our tale begins with the murder of this cute gal, now, who'd want to ta' do 'dat?!

Oh, never mind, look at this kwazy night club! And, look at those wild horns and cool suits! We've seen this band before in other flicks with Santo.

Here's a small pack of Diabolical Women, taking some time off to get drunk on their asses!

Somehow, Blue Demon is targeted for some diabolical plan!

But, what all bad guys fail to remember is that he can kick your ass in the snap of a finger!.. Yeah, I'm looking at YOU, pencil neck!!

Our nemesis, Mr. Big... Really, Mr. Big! Well, he has a plan to frame our hero by creating another wrestling Blue Demon ringer, this one is into murder though.

Then, the two Demons battle it out in the ring in front of a confused audience! I can tell in the bottom still that the guy standing is not Blue Demon, by the way his legs look.

Oh, what the Hell, one good choke hold deserves another!!

Mr. Big has a warehouse where he can torture the ones that oppose him, but, why would you hang a plaster guitar on the wall?! It defies logic.

The real Blue Demon shows up only to be staring down the nose of a pistol...

But, as things go, Mr. Big is exposed for who she is... Miss Not-So-Big! Then, she gets the evil eye from our kick-ass hero before she's taken away!

See you later, have a good one!!.. We're back on Wednesday with more... At The Dungeon!!

WHO KILLED WHO? - Tex Avery (1943)

Some cartoons attempt to have some semblance of a story and others are nothing but a series of gags! "Who Killed Who?" is without a doubt, the latter!

The funniest thing about old cartoons is that they took them very seriously, as least as far as looks were concerned, and the artwork like this title card is generally very stunning!

The uncredited host and narrator is Robert Emmet O'Connor who just might possibly be the most uncredited actor in film history! Looks to me that in over half of the 213 films and shorts he was uncredited usually as a detective, a police sergeant, a judge, a sheriff, a riverboat captain, a prison warden, an immigration officer, a bartender, a secret service man, a cab driver, a magistrate, a game warden, a train conductor, a stage manager, a watchman, a baggage attendant, a motorman, a station attendant, a doorman, and/or a drunk! Look at that mug, movies would be nothing without this kind of super regular guy! Here's Robert's explanation of what "Who Killed Who?" is all about!

A dark and stormy night!

Here's the victim! That's about all you need to know! 

The rest is Gag City!

Some gags don't work unless you're really olde or you are a student of the past!

This is a "BooooLova" cuckoo clock! "Bulova" was a major watchmaker of the day!

This is a very large pistol!

When the Detective shows up to investigate the shooting, he tells everybody "Don't move!"  When a member of the audience gets up to get popcorn or go to the restroom, the Detective smacks him in the head!

For some reason, the hired help are the main suspects!

This is what the Detective gets when he asks them if they have any weapons!

While looking for clues, the Detective sees this picture on the wall, but quickly dismisses it! He then goes back to have another look, but the young lady has disappointingly closed her jacket!

This ghost comes unfurled after seeing a live mouse!

Another olde gag! Introducing Red Skeleton! 

(Red Skelton was a very popular comedian of the time!

Looking for clues in all the wrong places, of course!

They thought this gag was funny enough that they used it on the poster! A "Do Not Open Till Christmas" door reveals a hostile Santa Claus that promptly bops the Detective on the head!

It all wraps up with this diabolical hooded henchman!

He would have shot the Detective, but his gun is on empty!

The Detective goes to great lengths to deceive the henchman!

Finally the moment we've all been waiting for! Who is this evil masked man?

Well, what do you know about that! It was the host Robert Emmet O'Connor all along! No wonder he was uncredited so often! He obviously had some things to hide! Robert died in 1962, so I guess enough time has passed that the truth about his sordid past can now be revealed!