GARDEN OF THE DEAD - Jaime Mendoza-Nava (1972)

With a title like "Garden Of The Dead," you know they were reaching for immortality! What could possibly be next? "Fruitstand Of Freaks?" "Farmer's Market Of Horror?" "Swapmeet Of Terror?" I don't know, and I'm sure as Hell not in any mood to try and find out!

So, it's time for another Saturday Night Special in The Dungeon, and tonight we're celebrating the fact that a movie called "Garden Of The Dead" might have been a lot better off if it had stayed buried, but there is one thing that you cannot deny, and that's the music composed by the mind of the genius Jaime (Orgy Of The Dead) Mendoza-Nava is exceptional, and almost makes the whole experience worthwhile, almost, so if you're really experienced, then dig in and enjoy!

It's hard, I mean it's not hard, to believe that "Garden Of The Dead" was filmed in only 10 days! As you can clearly see, the quality of the production is impeccable!

What? I dunno! There's a prison that's also a formaldehyde plant, and when they can get a chance, the prisoners get high inhaling the stuff?

Pretty freakin' desperate bunch if you ask me! I'm not sure what they do when the lights go out, they never delved into that area!

Well, Hot Damn, I feel pretty freakin' good! Before Viagra, they had formaldehyde to keep you stiff!

One of the prisoners has a hot girl friend that drives all the guys wild when she comes to visit! Susan Charney had the role of Carol Johnson in her solo on screen performance!

The prisoners loaded up on formaldehyde plan a daring escape, and in the process, they all get killed, and then buried in the prison yard, aka the garden!

Public Service Announcement: For all of you out there that don't know already, it turns out that sniffing formaldehyde isn't that great for you after all! I don't know why? It's only used to preserve dead bodies!

The only other female in the movie gets killed by a zombie for wearing that quilt! These zombies don't like light, and it was blinding them!

Don't be fooled by how good these stills look, this really isn't the greatest movie in the world!

Unlike "The Walking Dead" zombies, these guys can think a little, aren't really into eating flesh that much, and don't mind using tools like axes to do their dirty work! They also know how to run!

It's truly amazing how important light is to film making!

These zombies don't really crave blood or flesh.................

They're a bunch of druggies, and what they want is more formaldehyde!

Nice pair of trucks!

Second on the zombie shopping list after formaldehyde is Carol Johnson! They remember her from when they were human, and they might be zombies, but they know a good thing when they see it!

They set Carol up as bait!

And then they open fire! Ya'll don't come back now, ya hear?

Zombie Target Practice!

IF you're a zombie completionist, then you're gonna want this movie fer sure and you can get it at Sinister Cinema! The rest of you might want to take a bye on this one!

THE GREAT LAND OF SMALL / Les Productions La Fête Inc. - 1987

Here's a weird little flick I transferred from VHS a few years ago, so, it must be time to check it out! It's a Canadian movie about two children that enter a fantasy kingdom where they are confronted by evil forces. Not that complicated...

I've got a little sound clip from this movie for your approval, sooooo, you can push the big red 'GO' button over by our bag of fool's gold dust, NOW, Rufus The Gnat!.. Here's a sample of... THE GREAT LAND OF SMALL!

The story starts at a circus where mom explains to her two kids where they came from! Not really, she's doing some stretching before she practices her act.

Michael J. Anderson plays Fritz, the king of Small. Now, if you ever wanted to know about a super interesting person in film, well, this is your guy!! Just a couple of things about this amazing 3' 7" man... He was born in Huron, South Dakota, on Halloween night in 1953 with the disease Osteogenesis Imperfecta and grew up in a wheelchair, worked for Martin Marietta, troubleshooting NASA computers in ground-support systems of the space shuttle, was the backwards-talking dream figure on the cult TV series TWIN PEAKS and worked on the experimental performance piece 'Industrial Symphony No. 1: The Dream of the Brokenhearted' for David Lynch.

Here's the guy that ends up with gold dust but his name's not Dustin! A little note, our hero wrassler Dusty Rhodes just died last week on June 11th...

Here's the thing, cross over through the rainbow and you enter The Great Land Of Small!

I dunno, I just don't think that The Great Land Of Small is actually all that great!

With limited budgets, people have to be creative, that's what I always say. Look at this shot, it's like, see what you can come up with at the dump when you're in charge of set design..

Here are people going into this modern looking concert hall, they have tickets to see...

THE CRAZY WORLD OF ARTHUR BROWN!!.. "I am the god of Hell fire and I bring you.. Fire, I'll take you to burn, fire, I'll take you to learn, I'll see you burn!"

Anywho, the dude with the dust causes the volcano to shoot off fireworks as our heroine tries to stop him. He shoots a burst of colorful plasma at her and...

Knocks her on her ass!.. Not to worry, the good guys win, and, we're back tomorrow with more from... The Dungeon!!

HAPPY DAYS - Ub Iwerks & Carl Stalling (1936)

Here's a little information for all you Blogger neophytes! If you're an html moron like I am, and you're writing a post like this one, there are certain scary unknown places where you can hit control Z to undo something, and it totally wipes out your whole post, and as far as I can discern, there is no redo at that point! It's a real pisser when you've just spent a couple of hours on something, and you have to do it all again! Not only is the fire gone, but a lot of the ideas are also gone forever, and that's exactly what happened when I was working on this one, and that's something that will really test your meddle!

Lucky for me, this time it was only a cartoon, so.....
"Happy Days" are here again!  
The music was created by the immortal Carl Stalling, a man with an incredible 760 credits!
You're probably familiar with some of Ub Iwerks many cartoons, but later in his career, he was also the special photographic advisor for movies like Walt Disney's "The Parent Trap," and Alfred Hitchcock's "The Birds!" Iwerks and Stalling, the original dream team!

When was the last time you saw a group of neighborhood kids out digging for worms so they could all go fishing? I'm thinking like never!

This scene was one big joke, the golfer says fore, but the kid says five, because that's how many worms he found in the golfer's divot, and so the banter goes back and forth, again and again!

Quite the bargain, but I'm still not sure about the ethics of selling a car to a bunch of grammar school kids!

The car is such a piece of crap, the mechanic pushes it to make it go! The naive kids are really impressed with the speed they're traveling!

The tires are all flat, so the kid known as Pinhead volunteers to air them up!

But this is what happens when helium is substituted for compressed air! As a point of reference, here's a song that Hermanos Guzanos recorded over 25 years ago called "Helium Man!"

The flying car is not recognized as friendly and the authorities attempt to shoot it down!

Pinhead finally catches a fish the hard way!

This last shot reminds me of an ink drawing Tabonga made in high school of a bunch of little butts releasing gas!

HOUSE OF HORRORS / Universal Pictures - 1946

It's a hot and humid summer day, here at the Dungeon... Anyway, here's a rare treat for us, all about a struggling expressionist sculptor who enlists the aid the notorious Creeper to model for his newest creation and to pay back the critics who rebuffed his work.

I have a sound clip for your approval, sooooo, you can push the big red 'GO' button located there by our mad sculpture lab, NOW, Ralphie The Tarantula!.. Here's... HOUSE OF HORRORS!

Here's sculptor Marcel De Lange played by Martin Kosleck, he's having dinner with his little pal. My little pals like to lay right in the middle of everything when I'm working on my art. Martin was also in Dungeon favorites like THE MUMMY'S CURSE, THE FROZEN GHOST, THE FLESH EATERS and AGENT FOR H.A.R.M.

After being insulted by an art critic and losing a sale, Marcel grabs a big old knife and chases the two out of his studio. He's so distraught that he plans on committing suicide at the docks...

But, as luck (or unluck) would have it, Marcel rescues The Creeper from the drink instead. He helps him to his studio and brings him breakfast and tells him of his plan to use him as a model for a new sculpture.

Here are Virginia Grey and Alan Napier as reporter Joan Medford and her editor, F. Holmes Harmon. She's interested in the Creeper case...

Here's glamor artist Steven Morrow working on a piece with his model. Robert Lowery plays the artist and Joan's boyfriend.

Marcel sics Rondo on this art critic in his paisley smoking jacket!

Meanwhile, Marcel is hard at work on this large bust of the Creeper...

Joan has stolen the sketch of the Creeper to give to the newspaper, but unfortunately, Rondo was hiding in the background and saw her take it. When she returns to see Marcel, the big guy rats her out!

But, in the heat of the moment, Rondo turns on Marcel and finishes him off over the sculpture, then goes after Joan...

The police have arrived and shoot the Creeper through the window, bringing our tale to a sad end. Check back in on Wednesday for more from The Dungeon gang!