Thanx to KD's suggestion, I've got a Super-Duper Saturday X-Mas Special for you tonight, a veritable "Holiday Adventure that dazzles your eyes...fills you with fun!"
"Magic Christmas Tree" is like the "Manos" of Christmas movies!
It's slow, strange, odd, and weird, sometimes all at the same time!
I seriously thought something was screwy when "Magic Christmas Tree" started off as a Halloween flick!
This witch wants the little neighbor boy to climb a tree to save her cat!
He does it, but falls and hits his head, and when he awakes, it's in living colour!
In gratitude, the witch gives the little boy a magic ring!
Flash forward to Thanksgiving day and the prefect nuclear family!
Well, you just have to love this happy couple, the parents of the kid with the magic ring! The husband is Dick Parish, who was also the Director! His wife is darling Darlene Lohnes! These were the only two acting roles these two ever had! Hard to imagine!
There is a scene of the husband guy trying to start his lawnmower that apparently needs a tuneup that goes on for at least five minutes! Also a large portion of the sound is overdubbed with all kinds of over the top sound effects!
And his wife is yakking on the phone to her girlfriend the whole time with the loud lawnmower in the background!
Out of nowhere, a Christmas tree has sprung up in their back yard! (Blame the kid!)
There are a gazillion images you could find, but this freakin' looks like my childhood Christmas!
Mom and Dad go out, and the kid has some quiet time with the tree, which can now talk!
The boy was played by Chris Kroesen in his solo acting venture! Thus far, I would have sworn this movie was made in Texas, but it was actually filmed in La Verne, California!
The tree is magic and transports itself into the living room, and then decorates itself, and I think that the tree at this point is looking like a festive version of "The Beast From Haunted Cave!"
Good ole T-Bird gas, probably about twenty cents a gallon!
"The Magic Christmas Tree" gives the boy three wishes, one of which is to have magic powers for an hour! At that point, the movie turns into the Keystone Kops, and about ten minutes of the kid making vehicles run off with no driver! It would be hilarious if it was funny, but it's not!
Bummer time! The kid uses his second wish to have Santa Claus all to himself! And that's the story of how one little bastard in 1964 tried to ruin Christmas for the whole entire stinking world!
Santa is stuck in the chair, and can't believe what has happened to him!
Robert 'Big Buck' Maffei is only one of two actors in this film with any other credits! The other one being stuntman Willard W. Willingham! Here Robert is a guy named Greed, who lets the kid know what's up! At 7'1" Robert also had roles in "Star Trek," and "Lost In Space" as a creature and a cyclops! His last role was in Cheech and Chong's "Nice Dreams!" Big guys go down hard sometimes! Robert passed away at 52 in 1982!
Spoiler Alert: The kid uses his last wish to make the other two wishes not happen, and wakes up, and it was all only a dream!!! Or.......Was it??
"Magic Christmas Tree" is one big gigantic mess, but I'm sure it's just as good as "The Christmas Story," a movie that, to this day, I've never been able to sit through, and if you don't believe me, then go ahead and waste an hour or your life, because you can watch it for FREE, right
And while you're there, do the right thing in the holiday spirit, and make a donation, even if it's only a couple of bucks, because a lot of what I've been able to bring to you here wouldn't have been possible without them!
So go blame this blog entry on me, willya? Well, PFFFFT! :P
ReplyDelete(PS: Just kidding! This "movie" makes me laff, every darn time!)
(PPS: Laff or puke, it really depends on whether my eyes are open!)
(PPPS: I can't wait for the holidays to be over, so I can watch something truly worthwhile again, like my Blu-ray of FROM HELL IT CAME!)
Tabonga made me do it! At least this is one movie that "Silver Angel" is better than, I think!
ReplyDeleteHey, don't go clipping on SILVER ANGEL, it's gots it all...
ReplyDeleteHey, I wanna see SILVER ANGEL someday! :D
ReplyDelete