TALES FROM THE DARKSIDE / The Satanic Piano - 1985

Today's little story goes like this... A struggling composer, Pete Bancroft, is contacted by the very strange Wilson Farber, who has invented a synthesizer that can read minds and may be able to help Bancroft in his career... Well, maybe yes, maybe no!

It stars Michael (CLEOPATRA JONES) Warren as Pete Bancroft, Lisa (married/divorced Lenny Kravitz) Bonet as Justine Bancroft, Philip (CATCH 22) Roth as Wilson Farber and Felice (BULLITT) Orlandi as Tony...

Here's Pete Bancroft, composer, he's in a slump and is poised to lose his fortune as a result...

Then, he gets a mysterious call from a Wilson Farber, he tells Pete he has a musical instrument that will solve all his financial and credibility problems!.. What the Hell?!

But, after Farber hangs up, he reveals a dirty little secret about the magical instrument.

Pete agrees to meet with Farber, the inventor lays out a deal that Pete cannot resist, he can use it at no cost, it's simply a gift to help him reach his full potential. The trick is, the machine will play whatever his mind can conceive, a true magical instrument, all he has to do is think!

Well, Pete loves it, he effortlessly composes music in his mind... A weird looking thing.

But, wouldn't you know it?!.. Farber has taken the instrument back along with Pete's daughter, Justine! Farber thinks her mind music is superior to dad's. Problem is, the instrument sucks the life force out of its victim, and, they die!

Pete tries to stop the maniac but Farber's stronger than he looks!

Not sure how to stop the transference, Pete punches the screen (VIRUS MAN), and when he pulls it out of the thing, it's all bloody and stripped of flesh... In other words, it really hoits!

Farber's working his magic, until...

Pete grabs Justine as Farber's machine goes haywire and 'splodes in his face!

And, who knows why, but, Pete's, I guess, real hand, is stuck in the freakin' machine!.. Whatever... Okay, we're back on Wednesday with a hump day post just for you!..

GENTLEMEN BRONCOS - "Title Cards" (2009)

 Tonight's Saturday Night Special has one thing going for it, so I'm just going to put the spotlight on that one element!!

I guess I'm just too olde to appreciate films like "Gentlemen Broncos" any more, but I'll tell you one thing, this movie has one of the best opening title sequences of any film I've seen lately, so in order to accentuate the positive, that's what I've got for you!

 "Gentlemen Broncos" is a story about a young Science Fiction author who gets his work ripped off by a famous writer, and then gets accused of plagiarism!

 So it's a stroke of genius to use pseudo covers of 1960's paperback books during the opening title sequences!

 Now I know a lot of you out there don't know what a book is, and for that I am extremely sorry that none of this makes sense!

There were many publishers of science fiction paperback books in the 60's, and each one of these fake covers is an homage to one or another!

Two of the more successful companies were Bantam and Ballantine!

I read many a novel published by Ace and Avon Books!

A lot of extremely cool books were published by Pyramid and/or Berkley Medallion!

Two more big publishers in the 60's were Dell and Crest!

I think what this movie is missing more than anything is counterbalance!

There's not one normal person, and it's like everybody in the whole universe is too weird to even shop at Walmart!

The husband and wife team of Jared and Jerusha Hess are responsible for most of this mess!

Jared and Jerusha Hess also wrote "Napoleon Dynamite" and "Nacho Libra" so it's not like they aren't talented, this thing just tries too hard!

I like this last cover the best, and I could have only hoped that "Gentlemen Broncos" would have been this good, but plain and simple, in my book, it just wasn't!
You are entitled to your own opinion!

ALICE'S ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND / Made In Wonderland, The Most Magical Musical Of All - 1972

Here's one from those crazy Brits! In this classic story by Lewis Carroll, Alice (Fiona Fullerton) falls down a rabbit hole and ends up in a magical dream world populated by surreal characters and bewildering adventures. As Alice searches for a way out of Wonderland, she encounters creatures such as the White Rabbit (Michael Crawford), the March Hare (Peter Sellers), the Queen of Hearts (Flora Robson), and the Dormouse (Dudley Moore). It includes many musical interludes sung by Alice and the other characters, natcherly.

On a picnic, Alice dozes off after eating. She drifts off into dreamland, where...

She falls down the proverbial Rabbit Hole, and goes down... Down... Down...

Alice goes through her 'too big'-'too small' routine. I like the part where she bumps her head on the ceiling as she attains her maximum height.

After extracting herself out of the rooms, the first character she meets is the hookah smoking Caterpillar played by Ralph Richardson. After a futile conversation with the worm, it slithers off into the woods.

Then, she meets the goofy Tweedledum (Fred Cox) and Tweedledee (Frank Cox), they sing a song of course. Because, well, they have an important message to get out to whomever will giv'em a listen!

Here are the March Hare and the Mad Hatter, Peter Sellers plays the Hare, Robert Helpmann plays the Hatter!

Alice spends some time at the Queen's palace. There are lots of fun things going on, like this wild croquet game where the cards are the wickets.

Lettuce not forget the Cheshire Cat played by Roy Kinnear. After awhile, the cat gets bored and disappears as mysteriously as he appeared.

Here's the Mock Turtle all in yet another quandary, he's played by Michael Hordern.

Love the makeup for the Gryphon, Spike Milligan plays the wild looking bird

Anyway, Alice goes on trial for being too big and out of place, the White Rabbit is the MC.

Alice has to defend herself against the allegations, but...

She is attacked by the others at the event, everything gets insane as Alice fights against the barrage of kookie characters!

Then of course, Alice wakes up from her slumber, only to tell her friends all about the adventures she had while in Wonderland!.. So, tune in tomorrow when Eegah!! will try and fulfill his weekly Dungeon Duties!