Sunday, November 18, 2007

MARS NEEDS WOMEN - Ron Stein - "Strip Club/Lounge/Radio" (1967)

Bubbles Cash whole movie career began and ended in 1967. She did two other films that year besides "Mars Needs Women", "Hip Hot and 21" & "Hot Thrills and Warm Chills." Maybe it had something to do with the Tommy Kirk Midas touch. Directed by no budget specialist Larry Buchanan, with music once again by the unstoppable Ron Stein, this TV movie comes across as some kinda Disney Sci-Fi, except when the Martians decide they need a woman who is a stripper, the movie gets pretty darn sleazy for 1967 TV. Too cool strip club twin sax, hammerin' piano, & crazy slinky guitar music at it's best, topped off with some lounge vibes, a wild little pop song off the radio, & back to the strip club again to take care of that stripper. Have a nice trip!

Here's Bubbles!!!! In 1967 TV movies, strip bars are full of old ladies in the audience!

They almost blew it, ordering a martini in Texas, Stupid Martians!!

Hey, that Martian looks a lot like a guy I saw in the strip bar!! Who they trying to fool?
Mars Needs Women

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Larry Buchanan's favorite story about MARS NEEDS WOMEN was about how Tommy Kirk would show up on the set reeeking of marijuana and liquor after a night of carousing the Dallas gay bars, dead asleep, and then it would come his turn to say his lines he would recite them perfectly in a single take. Larry credited Kirk's recall to his days as a child actor ....

-- Greg Goodsell

Douglas McEwan said...

You HAD to reek of marijuana (Which I do all the time) to suffer through the humiliaton of starring in this garbage. Kirk's professionalism is apparent in the anecdote. He knew his job and did it well. He was good actor. I've met him a few times, and I respect him much. He is VERY out of the closet now.

Walt Disney fired him when he learned he was gay, but then THE MISADVENTURES OF MERLIN JONES came out and was a hit, and the studio had to CRAWL to him to get him to come back to make the sequel, which is why THE MONKEY'S UNCLE was Tommy's last movie for Disney. Disney Studios has evolved on that issue since Tommy's day.

Oh man, is this movie hilariously terrible. I watched it about three weeks ago. The Martians, led by Tommy Kirk, arrive on earth wearing wet suits. The first thing they do is --- rob a gas station for "earth currency", then they rob a clothing store. (They break into a clothing store using an "air knife," not unlike Doctor Who's sconic screwdriver.) They have money now, from knocking over the Phillip's 66 gas station, why not just buy the clothes?

As they put on their earth clothes, one Martian, adjusting his new stolen necktie, says: "These ties serve no functional purpose..." (You know, he's right!) "... Red Planet abandoned the use of ties 50 years ago, as useless male vanity." Hello? Martians used to wear neckties, but stopped 50 years ago? So instead they wear wetsuits? Form-fitting wet suits? So much for "useless male vanity". Do ALL planets in the universe go through a wearing-neckties phase? This movie was made almost 50 years ago, so I guess Mars hasn't needed a nice necktie now in a century.

Tommy says that the ratio of men to women on Mars is 100 to 1. They come to earth with the mission of taking back FIVE earth women. Well, with that ratio, it stands to - ah - "reason" that there wouldn't be many Martians at all, so I guess five is enough to make the ratio 1 to 1.

Better title would have been: MARS NEEDS STRIPPERS!

Eegah!! and Tabonga! said...

D,
I also read that you were a comedian, with this comment, I believe it!

D. McEwan said...

I've been known to get a laugh now and then.

Unknown said...

Bubbles Cash is my Mother and you are wrong, I just spoke to her and well, you may contact me for the correct information thru my email, thank you and HaPpY New Year.

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